K-Hole

My tweets peaked in 2013

[K-Hole @NotThatKunal]

Me: So peaceful today

Anxiety: No it's not

[Keats @KeatonFisher19]

Imagine losing your life savings and then you’ve got fucking Wall-E & his mates Gegenpressing you as you try leave

[Jackson Doud @JacksonDoud]

Dude behind me at lunch ordered “The usual.”

Got hit back with a “and that would be?”

Has to be absolutely devastating. Can’t even imagine.

[mariana Z @mariana057]

The gender neutral term for sugar daddy is glucose guardian…

[Gordo MONK: Champion of Peace ☮️ and Calm😶‍🌫️ @fordoglunk]

Absolutely gorgeous mid-20s summer Friday. I probably have 30 of these left, ever. Im gonna play video games in my apartment

[Alex Hirsch @_AlexHirsch]

@LupinZenigataEr @kimmonismus I haven’t any idea what you mean

[Jesus ୨୧ @clownlamba]

I have tasted employment, I have tasted unemployment. I highly recommend generational wealth

[sophie @netcapgirl]

that’s him, his dashboards haven’t produced a single actionable insight

[get busy living or get busy ryan @ryanmatttheu]

this is the best day on twitter since a submarine exploded

[Nate @thenatewolf]

I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

[just Dave @davelebies]

they should schedule doctor appts like

DOORS 8:15
Nurse 8:25
Doctor 8:40

[trash jones @jzux]

requesting PTO at work is so embarrassing. "hi boss permission to enjoy my life for 3 days?"

[trash jones @jzux]

microdosing vacation by dissociating at work

[shelby wolstein @ShelbyWolstein]

i dont simply go through airport security. i have a goal. i want everyone in line to be blown away by my efficiency. i want to be celebrated as i push my belongings across the table. i want TSA to offer me a job (i’ll decline). i want people talking about me at their gate. glory.

[Swim Jeans 👖 @ShortSleeveSuit]

*stands in the delivery room and boos all of the new babies to get them used to the real world*

[Seinfeld Current Day @Seinfeld2000]

JERY SEINFELD: whats the deal with airplane peanuts oh no

[CEO OF AMERICAN AIRLINES STARTS MARCHING TOWARD STAGE]

[soul nate @MNateShyamalan]

in honor of the ides of march, would anyone like to stab me 23 times

[jon drake @DrakeGatsby]

I get on a Zoom call and immediately become a different person. Tell me why I just said “okie dokie” to somebody

[Mowgli @Holy_Mowgli]

who decided to “spring forward” at 2 a.m. on the weekend. we should do it at 4 p.m. on a monday