The 😇Oomny😈 One

Satirist and author. Offending everyone like it’s 1999. If you say “D-E-I” three times fast—voila! You’re retarded.

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

Boy Girl Monster is a children’s book on how to overcome jealousy and loss through self-improvement. It’s apolitical, I promise you.

#childrensbook #picturebook #selfimprovement #kidsbook #Books_For_InnerPeace #childrensstory

https://t.co/j6XCosTvKz

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@Grummz Is this game satire and we just don’t know it?

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

I’ve been having so much fun on my satire account, I don’t have time to come here and complain about the end of the world anymore.

I recommend that you all start satire accounts immediately.

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@BretWeinstein #MeToo

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@Timcast They came to chew gum and talk politics…and they’re all outta gum?

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

Maybe it took that long to figure out what the robot’s pronouns were?

[IGN @IGN]

Concord, Sony’s live service hero shooter, has been in development for around eight years. https://t.co/4ydXdaZSaM

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@IGN Maybe it took that long to figure out what the robot’s pronouns were?

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

Ever since almost dying, Trump has been putting up with less shit than ever.

[End Wokeness @EndWokeness]

HOLY SHLIT

A reporter just asked Trump why he came to a town "linked to white supremacy"

Wait for his response 🔥💀🔥

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

The Democratic Party is so deranged you can’t even tell if this is real or satire.

[Alex Strenger @TheAlexStrenger]

Explaining to the @BBCNews why I am a proud #WhiteDudeForKamalaHarris

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

This election is an IQ test.

[BLAIRE WHITE @BlaireWhite]

I asked voters, “Trump or Kamala?" and it was shocking.

🔵 Kamala voters were mostly white, older, and had no idea why they’re voting for her.

🔴 Trump voters were mostly minorities with detailed explanations.

What do you think this means?
FULL VIDEO: https://t.co/U02Npr5XyK

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

Sometimes I’m impressed with the satire I come up with on the spot.

[Josue van Guard @ArtlessBruv]

Bill: “Most firemen at the station never vote blue. But me and Pete here, we ain’t like that.”

Pete: “You tell’m, Bill.”

Bill: “I’m tellin’ ‘em, Pete. That��s what I’m doin’. Truth is, Kamala is what keeps us on the city’s dime. You remember the Summer of Love, don’tcha?”

Pete: “Yeah, course I do.”

Bill: “I ain’t talkin’ to you, Pete. Don’t be a jagoff.”

Pete: “Sorry, Bill. Go on, tell’m.”

Bill: Whattya think I’m doin’ over here? I’m tellin’ ‘em. So anyway, Kamala encourages all them rowdy kids to burn stuff down. Then, after the burnin’ starts and them kids get arrested, she helps bail ‘em out so they can burn again! Keeps us busy, and no layoffs.”

Pete: “That’s it! Tell’m, Bill, you tell’m!”

Bill: “I already told’m, Pete, ya goddamn Jagoff! So anyway, that’s why we’re proud jizzlords for Harris.”

Pete: “Yeah! Proud jizzlords! That’s right! Just like he told ya!”

—Bill and Pete from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@latimes Good for him!

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

You can currently tell who’s an NPC and who has individual thoughts based on his or her usage of “weird.”

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@KamalaHarris Based on your Megan Thee Stallion concert, I believe you mean “get to twerk.”

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@Nero You’re so sassy, there’s no way you’re straight.

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

The upcoming election is an IQ test.

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@IGN WHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@BretWeinstein Glad to see you’re having fun with Grok.

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

It can’t be said enough: the UK is fucked.

[End Wokeness @EndWokeness]

Holy sh*t

The UK is releasing 5k prisoners to make room for anti-immigration protestors

Some of those will be voiIent offenders

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

@IGN Fine…I’ll buy the game now…you’ve convinced me.

[The 😇Oomny😈 One @OomnyRocks]

Guys, I know it’s hard to think about what Eva is saying here without getting lost in those blue eyes, so allow me to paraphrase for you:

The UK is fucked.

[Eva Vlaardingerbroek @EvaVlaar]

🇬🇧 The day that David Spring (61) got sentenced to 18 months in jail, was the day UK citizens lost their freedom.

The message their government is sending is clear: “You don’t get to disagree with us. And if you do, we send you straight to jail.”

The UK is no longer a democracy.