Old Paulines

Old Pauline Football Club

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

Do these Daisy Dukes make my trash look White? http://t.co/RJSry1WyWt

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/jIpGFZRsJp Hey guys, I think I just got murdered but I'm not sure, and WebMD is like ZERO help.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

I would have been grounded for saying 66% of Dick Van Dyke’s name. http://t.co/2vftceskwz

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/OJosgx582f It's so hot, everybody looks like they're in an American Apparel ad.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/yRFu44r9pL If I were to have an affair I'd make sure to have a signed prehumptial agreement.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/gYLY6l16Bl PUMP UP THE JAM! PUMP UP THE JAM! --- supervisor at the Smucker's factory.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

I'm about to pound some meat. Sadly this is not a euphemism. Again. *sigh* http://t.co/jfZOAwoz8I

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

If your bathroom sink looks like mine, you're disgusting and I'm a hypocrite. http://t.co/m0JZuN0taP

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/grwFiqUdj5 will not get a cent of my money until they can tell me which apes I came from. http://t.co/BUn6KNrbeX

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/yMfE9Z5WuQ Telling a woman that you want to "rock her body" means something completely different in Pakistan.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/b4Hx7IZJPs I realize I misspelled a word in my last Tweet. On that note I'm about to eat a Famous Anus cookie.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

Ciger: close but no cigar. http://t.co/Vsf1InK7At

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/MhCu9Jr6Vx Life is more exciting when you're out there living it. I read that somewhere.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

I'm gonna get a neck tattoo that looks exactly like my neck. http://t.co/3G9nVXSE8G

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/IOjcuiH5mr If you have more than zero bumper stickers on your car you have too many.

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

If you have more than zero bumper stickers on your car you have too many. http://t.co/etB2WRvnCW

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/TdqWfiDp5c "It's not you, it's me. " - twins looking at family photos

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

http://t.co/LpZvwIOWF1 Rubbing my ass on these documents because the boss's email says to "cheek his paperwork".

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

Is there anything sexier than a woman who reads? Yes: Models. http://t.co/jdJ178OMyA

[Old Paulines @OPAFC]

"I liked small butts. I was lying." - Sir Mix-A-Lot's teary deathbed confession http://t.co/WAwSrkp9wU