ChicaliZoo

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

James Franco & Seth Rogen are like the new Ben Affleck & Matt Damon when it comes to making movies, but fatter and without the talent.

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

These assholes told me it was a sweater party. @RealHughJackman #JakeGyllenhaal

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

“Tio, you know who #JennaOrtega is?”
A niece asked me.

No, but I know white folks like her products. Especially the sliced green chiles and taco kits.

#TacoWednesday

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

Young woman approached my bar and ordered a #NegroniSbagliato my reaction was such that I was applauded by the rest of the patrons. Before she finished the word #prosecco I slapped the shit outta her.
Yes, I took a bow.

#bartenderNOTmixologist #bar #bartender

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

#MAGA #MAGAtts #pelosiattack #pelosi #DomesticTerrorism

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

After winning something like three hundred and eighty five games during the regular season, the #LosAngelesDodgers lost 3 of 4 to the #SanDiegoPadres for another disappointing year.

#NLDS2022 #MLBPlayoffs

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

In most cases #addicts must hit bottom in order to take the first step towards #recovery.
As a recovering addict I will venture to say that #SeanHannity attempt to shame #JoeBiden & #HunterBiden is much lower than the collective bottom of ALL addicts ever.

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

A great number of card carrying members of the Latinx community are upset about #JamesFranco portraying #FidelCastro in an upcoming movie, but not much noise about Cuban born #AnaDeArmas portraying #MarilynMonroe in the movie #Blonde

¿Porqué?!

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

After a long weekend of illegal #fireworks & fireworks with legal status, my list of Things I Hate the Most remains intact.
#BandaMusic is still on top.

#IHateBandaMusic #FourthofJuly #CincoDeJulio

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

I truly believe with all my heart that there isn’t ANYONE in my life that uses their religious beliefs to dictate what other can or can not do.
ANYONE that matters. That is.

#RoeVWade #WomensRights #religionbasedonfiction

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

I can honestly say that there is not one person in my life that supports #SCOTUS decision to overturn #RoeVWade

Not one person that TRULY MATTERS in my life. That is.

#WomensRights

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

Woke up this morning and found myself back in 1972 thanks to #SCOTUS and #MarvinGaye #WhatsGoingOn becomes even more relevant.

#RoeVsWade
#WomensRights

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

#SummerSolstice2022 is officially here, which means
Fall is only 91 days away.
YES!

#summerisoverrated #SuckFummer

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

Hey #WillSmith
This guy said something about your wife. I swear!
#GRAMMYs #64thAnnualGrammyAwards #JustinBieber

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

#BruceWillis has been diagnosed with #aphasia
#ChrisRock better not make any jokes about his baldness
Demi will smack the crap outta him

#smackittysmack
#Oscars2022

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

Is there an awards show for Oscar winners lame acceptance speeches?
I’ve got a solid nomination.

#WillSmith
#ChrisRock
#AcademyAwards2022
#Oscars2022
#wheretheresaWILLtheresaslap

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

@pattonoswalt @TheIrvineImprov I’ve some hockey gear that you can borrow, but Ricky Gervais needs it for his next award show.

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

What if Wanda Sykes had told the G.I. Jane joke, what then?

#Oscars2022 #AcademyAwards2022 #WillSmith
#ChrisRock

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

@pattonoswalt Testicular cancer scanner

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

My predictions for tonight’s #Oscar ceremonies are
(not that anybody cares)
-I will not be watching
-I will be watching
#RichardPryor movies.

#AcademyAwards #Oscars2022

[ChicaliZoo @PacVeliz]

Hey!
At least
#JoeRogan
didn’t steal his racist
comments from
#CarlosMencia