Perry Block

Humorist seen in @McSweeneys, @SlackjawHumor, more, currently doing sketch & not being seen in McSweeneys, Slackjaw, more

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

@PeevishPenman I miss you.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

I am a great fan of the writings of Henry David Thoreau, but I always thought "Walden" would have been much funnier if he'd added a goofy sidekick.
And now, he has!
https://t.co/nMZZvLVi9e

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

@BellandaInParis Good Morning, Bellanda! Only difference is you're in Paris and I'm in Brooklyn.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Here's a nice pink fireworks display for you for Barbenheimer Weekend.

Good thing they chose to emphasize the Barbie side - and not the Oppenheimer one - when it came to "bombs bursting in air!"

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Twitter now to be called "X?" As an EX user, can't get too EXERCISED but must EXPRESS & EXHORT:

Musk's brain must be X-RAYED EXPEDITIOUSLY!
It's an EXIGENCY.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

How do I hate cheese? Let me count the ways!

If you also hate cheese - and if you do I LOVE YOU! and one day hope to marry you - you may find this of interest.

https://t.co/1WZkfmznFP

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Now I've seen everything: I've just been insulted by a parking meter!

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

@SuzanneMoseman The one true "THREADS HEAD!"

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

📷perry.block1

Here's the term I predict will soon become universally applied for people using the new "Threads" App:

"THREADS HEADS"

Remember: You heard it here first. And on Twitter yet!

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Looking forward to giving the new "Threads" app a try. I can't wait to be ignored on a new social network every bit as much as I am on Facebook, Twitter, & Instagram. Ah, it's a good life. Here's the countdown. https://t.co/YhzzMBjZqe

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Ryan Seacrest has now been named to take over "Wheel of Fortune" succeeding Pat Sajak.
"It will be quite a challenge stepping into Pat's shoes," said Mr. Seacrest, "which I understand are both right wingtips."https://t.co/PGNJPcuJPl

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

DeSantis will announce his candidacy on Twitter tomorrow in conversation with Elon Musk.
DeSantis & Musk.
Worst. Vaudeville. Act. Ever.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Don't wanna say I'm old but as an aging Boomer I think TikTok is what I want my heart to keep doing.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

I never get any response on Twitter with my humor so I thought I'd post a cute dog, my son's dog Bruno, & see if I get a response. C'mon look at those eyes! You know you love him.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

I can't look at one of these without seeing a face exhibiting terror. Whenever I go to plug something in I think "OMG, a horrible monster is right behind me!"

You probably haven't thought that yourself. Until now.

Sorry if you can't unsee that.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

This particular tweet contains the funniest joke most of you will ever read in your life!
(Note: Your results may vary.)

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

@perrykurtz I dunno. Probably Tucker Carlson.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Rupert Murdoch, 92, is all set to marry for the fifth time.
Pretty soon he'll have enough wives for a minyan.

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

@WXPNDanReed Hey, Dan, I was privileged to meet you at the Countdown to Ecstasy/Mellow Fever concert last Thursday & I took this picture I wanted to share of you guys killing it with Lauren Hart. Thanks for your years at XPN and ... it's all about the music!

[Perry Block @PerryBlock]

Why are you guys all still on Twitter? Twitter was so fun in the early days when you could meet ALL kinds of folks before it became the choice method of communicating for politicians & world leaders.

Now it's no fun for a shlimazel like me. I'd define schlimazel but what for?