Penny Kowers

Hall Of Fame Pitcher in the PBE, the best in league history. Awesome Dude. Hates cats. Humanitarian. I also run the Detroit Demons. #FKVAN

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

20 years ago, the VAN mascot poisoned me and I almost died. Nobody bats an eye.

Fast forward to now, and people are furious at someone saying “NOLA is a good team” and calling someone sweetheart.

This is why we shouldn’t give everyone a trophy when they’re 3. #PBESim #FKVAN

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Watching Detroit kick some a ss is fantastic. #PBEsim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@KyleBellingerJ1 @SuperTardis101 Pay attention kid. Penny Kowers isn’t a follower, he’s a leader. Therefore he follows no one. People follow Me. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@DeferrariMatty Oh, we do. That’s why we’re focused on them instead. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Final vote tallies were in:

Six write-in votes for Penny Kowers to be elected President. Not bad considering I didn’t even try.

#PBEsim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Man, I remember when the PBE was a tough league. I had a mascot poison me for F’s sakes. Now if you say like “holy Christmas!” You get a two week ban for not mentioning everyone other religion or something. We, no, they got soft. Very soft. #PBESim #MaybeItsTimeToMakePBEFunAgain

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Amazing. These kids in Detroit actually listen to the greatness that I spit at them, and we’re defying projections. 12-11? I’ll take that. Better than DVS? FK yeah. #pbesim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@KyleBellingerJ1 @PBE_SB_66ers @DemonsDetroit Oh wtf is this.

Turn your caps off, get focused on being more awesome, and stop kissing so much ass.

You’re mine now. Act like it. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Hey idiots. Go vote.

For me, into the Hall of Fame. What else would I mean?

#Kowers2020 #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

I don’t like to give credit like, ever.

BUT IM FEELING CRABBY TONIGHT. #PBEsim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Man we suck. I might have to come out of retirement. #pbesim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@brentolomew @PBE_Vandals This little nobody out here talking smack like the entire franchise didn’t cry when I left you guys. Obviously the GM made a mistake, that’s why they replaced that clown. Talk your smack, but remember that you’re a #NeverWas. Have fun not winning another World Series. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

Rumors abound that Vancouver might rebrand because people don’t like them. Get tough losers. You’re a tent pole franchise for our history. You’re not allowed to change. You earned that hate. It’s jealousy. Except mine. Mine is real. #NoChanges #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@ABentleyPBE You can’t be my rival since you’ll never be on my level. I know a lifetime of “everybody gets a trophy” day made you feel entitled, but it’s the only ‘title’ you’ll end up winning.

#PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@Sippycu10102030 @BigDaddyKVB Part of being a worldwide trendsetter there. Now literally the entire world is growing their hair out, and acting like it’s a “pandemic” issue. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@ProvidenceCrabs It’s because I’m a f’n winner, stop trying to make it about you. You’re blue. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@ProvidenceCrabs It was for “Penny”. Pay attention. #PBESim

[Penny Kowers @PKowers]

@1Expansionteam I appreciate your badassery, that’s why I’ll go in the HOF as a Space Ranger. I’m happy to report Wooloo has been found, it appears a mysterious ‘visa issue’ cleared itself up in record time. #FoundWooloo #PBESim