rie ᯓ★

they/them

venttwt & personal diary

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

@zer0lemonade kpop, listening to catch catch by yena, ao3 smut, xtx yaoi, bl, gl, psychological thrillers, concerts, clubbing, drinking molly tea, going into credit card debt by going out too much, pulling pokémon cards, collecting kpop pcs, et cetera

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

waitt boh worker told me i'm getting skinny we are so back

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

everything will be okay it's fine you are safe really whatever happens will happen there's so much time you can live on your own terms it's okay you are so full of love

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

something is making me so sad abt this like you were 15 girl i'm sad no one took care of you more...

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

hii ! i'm new to edtwt and would love some moots , ♡︎

𖦹 she they
𖦹 15
𖦹 unlabeled
𖦹 ugw 120lbs

♡ / ↻ to be mutuals!

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

i need to be so patient with myself like i literally lost a family member during senior year of hs, have had emotionally neglectful parents, and no one growing up as a good role model and had to do most of my medical stuff myself like i'm chilling

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

i will live the life i want to live i have goals too and i'm allowed to achieve it all :) i can serve people and serve myself the most because i need to stop avoiding myself deadass like i will get nowhere with avoidancee

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

xtx helping me sm in the past months trulyyyyyyy they get me through so much like my heart feels less heavy with them

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

hhhhhhhhhh i will skip lab i will shower i will make my exam sheet i will go to ceremony i will take exam i will go to ceremony again

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

i have a lab an exam and a ceremony today but my brain is genuinely shutting down bc i also want to clean my room and then i have to study for the exam but like i haven't done shit in the past weeks godddd

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

might js turn this into a food log account ... through therapy genuinely like i had to realize that being too harsh on myself all these years was really detrimental like NO DUH but it's like wow looking back no wonder i was miserable

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

19 years old second yr college abt to transfer actually yes i have come so far i should be more proud of myself 😭😭

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

me when i lie

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

the way i'm abt to end my second year of college and i'm lwk still unaccomplished but it's okay bc i'm definitely less miserable but holy i have not learned to study nor have i changed my body a bit im begging for me to get serious and take care of myself atp

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

i need to get worse ......... hello freshman year of college 😍

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

okay well i have a job and meds... then what 🧐 im like 70% away from a clean room and like i barely study and i'm still fat asl so like uh

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

okay after i get a clean room, study skills, daily routine, a job, adhd dx, adhd meds, a will to live, skinny face, and a flat stomach it's over for y'all

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

when ur friend gets into a relationship and they start caring abt how fat they look all of a sudden o ok....

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

cant stop scrolling and cant stop comparing my body but like i know negativity won't get me anywhere bc thats not how my brain works and im just gonna binge more and shit omg how do i get out of this hellhole i've been in for 4+ years

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

wishing i was kinder to myself!!!!!!!!! like ofc it hurts because everyone is making progress and it seems like i'm not but i have a different baggage that i'm carrying yo

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

i need to stop pushing the idea that i need to do 19472938 million things at once to change like i literally keep pushing myself to not do anything in the end cause i'm so stressed

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

the way i never got the tongue piercing 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

tongue piercing so i don't eat WOOHOO

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

oo so we're like halfway through the year and i'm lwk still depressed but therapy has been good

[rie ᯓ★ @pochacaIs]

tongue piercing so i don't eat WOOHOO