Jason

Sup

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

@TwoPoundPunt Mate if it's anything like I had a couple weeks ago, the diarrhea you'll get in a day or 2 is next level 💀🤢

[Senses Fail @SensesFail]

#NewProfilePic

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

@TwoPoundPunt Looks like hotdogs on top 🤣

[Fuck off @Get_effed]

Portugal are playing tonight, so here's your reminder that anyone who refers to Cristiano Ronaldo as "CR7" takes baths with their dad

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

@ronaldobrownn_ Mate that guy thinks spaghetti carbonara is healthy 🤣

[Cookie Monster @MeCookieMonster]

If you are ever feeling a little crumby, me want you to know me here for you.

[Wayne Barton @WayneSBarton]

Medals round their neck, trophies in their hand, Bruno Fernandes in their head

[RN @rnvidss]

Even the players know they play shit football

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

Happy birthday to the King 🤴

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

Wishing Eric Cantona a very happy 6️⃣0️⃣th birthday! 🎂

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

Havent been this gutted about a player leaving since cry baby Ronnie 🥲 (The first time)

[Casemiro @Casemiro]

🔴

[Cookie Monster @MeCookieMonster]

Me like to leave some cookie crumbs in me fur for later. Me call it second snack.

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

@StretfordPaddck I never want to see Ugarte play for us ever again.
Surely hes off at half time

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

What 😲😂

[Woking Football Club @wokingfc]

Woking Football Club is pleased to confirm the appointment of Jermain Defoe as the club’s new Manager. ♦️

[Less Than Jake @LessThanJake]

The Winter Circus Tour is just 2 weeks away and you could be there with your friends. Oooo friends! Ska friends!! Get your tickets now before it’s too late! https://t.co/DBoLZQyOL5

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

@StretfordPaddck @StatmanDave Correct me if im wrong but im sure he lost possesion of the ball most too, no? 🫣

[Michael Spicer @MrMichaelSpicer]

As it's Man City v Newcastle tonight, let's remember what happened two weeks ago.

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

Erm... 😂 @_DHOTYA

[The Husky @Mr_Husky1]

I own a small bakery. Business has been slow. Rent is up. I was thinking about closing.

Last Friday, a teenager came in. He looked nervous. He counted out change for a cookie. He was short 50 cents.

"It's okay," I said. "Take it."

He ate it at a table, looking at his math homework. He looked stuck.

I used to be a math tutor.

I walked over. "Quadratic equations?"

He nodded. "I don't get it."

I sat down and helped him for 20 minutes. He got it. He left smiling.

The next day, he came back with two friends. They bought cookies.

The day after that, five kids came.

Apparently, he told the school, "The lady at the bakery helps with homework."

Now, my bakery is the after-school hang-out spot. It's loud. It's messy. There are backpacks everywhere.

Yesterday, I found a note in the tip jar. It was wrapped around a $20 bill.

"Thanks for helping my son pass math. A Mom."

I'm not closing the bakery.

I think I finally found my purpose.

It's not cookies. It's community.

[Adam McKola @AdamMcKola]

They spent all week trying to tell us they'd beat 2008 Manchester United and couldn't even beat 2026 Manchester United. 😭

[Jason @Pollitt_JM]

Not with those substitutions we wont

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

"We'll back him from the Stretford End!" 🎶🔊

[DANNY SIMPSON @dannysimpson]

That final episode of @the_traitors_ was one of the best things I’ve seen on TV in a very very long time 😂😂😂😂

Alan Carr well played 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽