Diana

A Canadian. A sensitive mouthpiece. A clever dumbass. An ally always.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

Eating my banana like it’s corn so I don’t get called to HR.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@ValhallasGhost They’re essentially cutesy and young-looking, and very, very short.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

Looking through a “vintage” shop with my kid, and she pulled out a babydoll dress AND a top I owned…in 1995.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@1brightman1 Don’t be REASONABLE about it. The 90s were 10 minutes ago 😂

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

Sometimes, you'll meet someone who makes everything feel electric, and the hardest part is accepting that, no matter how undeniable the connection is, they're not someone you get to keep.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@pirateyeti You’ll get no sympathy here, tall one! Lol

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

“Aagh! My corneaaaaaaaahs!”

- Me, just now

Related: sun visors are fucking worthless if you’re under like 5’8”, I swear.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@N_Doemostmuted Excellent choice.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@supermarkusa Intellectual foreplay is actually a deciding factor for me.

[🇨🇦𖤐 Father Red McGee 𖤐 🇨🇦 @FatherRedMcgee]

Just a reminder that curvy tattooed women are a gift from the gods.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@Dude_Photo_01 Gotta be honest, I think I could move up that list…

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

Put me in a room with babies, dogs, and dudes, and that’s the order I’m interested in them.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

In my mind, dark tights somehow make a short skirt seem like not that big a deal. At least that’s what I’m telling myself until HR calls me in.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@ms_amerie_jayne I can’t help it. I’m a sucker for babies.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@PP3789404966587

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@MgtmMoisan If I hadn’t already eaten so much of the baking that she’s brought in I’d try that 😂

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

As I walked in from the warehouse, one of the office ladies cornered me to talk about her meatloaf recipe. She knows I hate meatloaf, but kept insisting I just hadn’t tried hers. Said she’d bring me some. Tomorrow.

It’s Monday at 7:24 am, Patricia, calm the fuck down.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@ValhallasGhost 😂

[machine pun jelly👹 @iamvkhil2]

c'mere baby, you're the only 'yikes' in my life, i promise.

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

@Miss__Kitty__ I’ve been eyeing that shirt! ❤️

[Diana @PracticalBedlam]

I didn’t write this, but it’s accurate.