Dan

I solved a rubik's cube.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

I just wrote a review on Skechers Go Run 600 Sparkle Runner Kids Girls Slip On Athletic Shoes https://t.co/kj9gBosgSj via @yotpo

[Dan @Pufferfush]

You have a pie like a dropped face

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Idea for a headline if they had a bad concert: "Birds of Choke-yo"

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Free service: tell me what you plan to name your unborn child and I'll screen it for schoolyard bully nicknames.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

What's Scarlett Johansson's favourite breakfast?

[Dan @Pufferfush]

I don't get chia pods.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

After the award ceremony, Prof. Pyl couldn't remember where he'd parked. He turned to his wife and said: "where's the car dear?"

[Dan @Pufferfush]

What got him over the line was his novel idea of fermenting insects to produce an alcoholic beverage called "Antrum".

[Dan @Pufferfush]

In the end Profesor Pyl. received the research grant. Pretty tough competition, it was either pylorus.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

A colleague and I were planning an anatomical study of the stomach. Unfortunately it didn't go ahead because no one would fundus.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

If I weren't a wizard, I'd be on these: https://t.co/eVdTwKMGxS

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Anyone want to join my skate posse?

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Why has no one opened up a coffee shop called Frank Sumatra? 🤔

[Dan @Pufferfush]

On the set of a Matt Damon movie, the director asked if he was ready. "I was Bourne ready" he replied. Then everyone laughed and high fived.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Rollerbladers are people too

[Dan @Pufferfush]

A watched eBay order never delivers.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

It's so hot. Milk was a bad choice.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Not even a 12 year old yelling "do a flip" could stop me from blading tonight.

[Dan @Pufferfush]

If Eddie Redmayne was bald 🤓

[Dan @Pufferfush]

Rain raging