David Anders

I lie for a living & tell the truth as a hobby

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

Just good guys passing the ball is all

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

Shut your orange daft cunt fuck of a mouth up.

D*€

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Trump on solar panels: "They kill all the animals. The animals jump on them and they fry."

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

Natch

[The Sting @TheStingisBack]

Dana Carvey watched Withnail and I while prepping Wayne’s World 2, got fixated on Ralph Brown’s spaced-out Danny, and wrote him into the movie.
They treated it like a spiritual reprise, recreating the flat from Withnail, right down to the wallpaper.

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

Don’t ever hug him, dame!
Him calling this game + this hug could triple handedly loss us this game

[Portland Trail Blazers @trailblazers]

A whole lot of triples between these two

[Portland Trail Blazers @trailblazers]

Let's get it 😤

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

@lurie_john Reggie Miller will single handedly lose my Blazers this game.

#hack

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

It's always a small minority of enormous assholes who make life unpleasant for the large majority of regular-sized assholes.

[Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani @NYCMayor]

I am angry tonight.

Because today ICE shot a New Yorker. They shot a New Yorker while his five year old child was in the car.

ICE makes this city less safe.

We want them out. Now.

[John Lurie @lurie_john]

I thought as I grew older life might make more sense.

[No Context Brits @NoContextBrits]

Some will get this.

[Todd Spence @Todd_Spence]

In 1993, Chris Farley took a camcorder to an L.A. mall to teach guys how to flirt with women and the results were perfect 😂 this is the type of history we must preserve

[priscilla page @BBW_BFF]

Batman's big naturals are canon

[Dope thrills @essa_muse]

Hunter S. Thompson refused to come to the studio.

The only way Conan could get him on the show was to meet him on a farm in upstate New York. To shoot guns. And drink hard liquor.

They set up a full bar in a field. A bartender in a tuxedo handed Hunter a shotgun he’d never fired. Then an M60. They blew apart stuffed animals and a Bill Buckner target while Conan tried to look like this was a normal interview.

Hunter howled. Conan looked like he might not make it home.

This is still the least talk-show interview ever done on a talk show.

Genius making Conan come to him, or just the most dangerous booking in late-night history?

[George Wallace @MrGeorgeWallace]

Only a wockaflocka who knows he'll be remembered as dogshit runs around trying to carve his own name and face onto everything in sight and whatnot.

[Super 70s Sports @Super70sSports]

I miss the days when you could be an All-Pro wide receiver yet also look like a guy who talks to himself on the subway.

[Flea @flea333]

I have asked for a few autographs in my life:
Danny Manning
Jack Nicklaus (for my dad)
And the littlest cute guy from Hanson (for my daughter)
Only the littlest cute guy from Hanson said no

[Jo @JoJoFromJerz]

Holy. Fuck. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

Gus hearing himself becoming a pop star will never not POP

[David Anders @QuestionAnders]

The KID is 50.
He likes to KICK.
STRETCH.
And whatever the fuck he’s doing here.

#ChrisWylde