Funny Tweets

a collection of funny tweets that is updated daily

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

I don’t understand how my room gets so messy when i literally sit in one spot with my laptop all day

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

If zombies attack the world, everyone will run and hide. Except for us gamers, of course. We've been waiting for this all our lives!

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

Well of course Maywether won. He only picks fights he Knows he's gonna win. That's why the fight with paquiao never happened.

[The Female Book @thefemaleboook]

Other countries have way better commercials https://t.co/3O9ER9blh7

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

My girlfriend is leaving me cause of my obsession with Africa. Uganda be kidding me, Kenya believe it? Well, it's Ghana be a messy break up.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

What do you call a Bunny with bent Dick?FucksFunny

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

how about you fuck off for a week or two

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

I love my relationship with my bed. No commitment needed. We just sleep together every night.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

Mom: "Can I see your Twitter?"Me: "WHAT TWITTER?!" *throws laptop out window, runs to airport, moves to Mexico, changes name to Pepito*

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

♪ ROLL ROLL ROLL YOUR HOE FUCK HER TILL SHE SCREAMS BUST A NUT SMACK HER BUTT THEN PASS HER TO THE TEAM ♪ ♪

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

Niggas be like U.O.E.N.O this. U.O.E.N.O that. U.O.E.N.O, U.O.E.N.O.. How about MY FOOT UP YO ASS!? U.O.E.N.O

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

Around Parents: Normal Mode, on.Around friends: Silly Mode, on.Around Babies: Barney Mode, on.Around Crush: Retard Mode, on

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

getting into a relationship may seem like a good idea but so was getting on the Titanic and look what happened there

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

i am the best cook Because with 2 eggs, 1 sausage, and a little bit of milk, i can fill a girl's tummy for 9 months.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

What if every time you yawn, a ghost puts his dick in your mouth?

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

I believe in equality. If we have a 5 day week of school,we should have 5 day weekends as well.. you know so we can get all our work done.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

While on Facebook, I realized that I don't hate Facebook... I hate people.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

Ghetto Word Of The Day: Juicy - "Yo Jamal, The cops are looking for Dwayne, If juicy him, warn him.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

I met Eminem once, he was pretty awkward, his palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms were heavy, vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti.

[Funny Tweets @QuoteTheFun]

i only go on the internet like once a day for approximately 24 hours