ralphgarman

Philly boy goes to Hollywood to sell his soul ... Still looking for a buyer.

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

For the folks asking where they can find me ... You can hear #TheRalphReport every Monday thru Friday right here: https://t.co/RfeGTvzxdq
Join the GARMY!

[The Ralph Report Fanpage @TRRFanPage]

Duets and Harmonies tickle your ear holes today on #TheRalphReport with @RalphGarman, @EddiePence & Queen J.

Join the #Garmy on @Patreon: https://t.co/65gQ3Db076

[Acyn @Acyn]

Blow: The is a news show on a news channel and I have an ethical responsibility to say you are lying.

Lambert: Do not call me a liar on national TV sir! You are a liar!

Blow: You are liar.

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

When my daughter was a toddler, she would have conversations with imaginary friends on her toy phone. She was much more convincing than @RobWittman.

[MeidasTouch @MeidasTouch]

Rep. Rob Wittman (R-VA) faked a phone call for roughly 90 seconds after being asked about Speaker Mike Johnson’s comments regarding potential Social Security cuts.

The phone's screen remained visible, with his cheek inadvertently tapping different parts of the display.

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

But, how? California elections are all RIGGED! So, that means the GOP rigged this election? But ... Right? Or ... not ... because ... The Dems ... Damn. It's hard to keep up with you fenderheads.

[Jamie Kennedy @JamieKennedy]

Finally a WIN for the Good Guys!

[Jen Stewart Garman @jenrenstewart]

“This isn’t just a drawing book- it’s a permission slip to think weird” -@ThatKevinSmith
THAT is the best description of my book I’ve heard 😎🤘 Today this human made book officially launches 🎉 thank YOU all for supporting indie artists like me 🩷
https://t.co/d45Pf2CM8U #ad

[Congressman Robert Garcia @RepRobertGarcia]

If you think California is taking a while to count votes, wait until you hear how long the Trump Administration is taking to release the Epstein files…

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

Asia.

[LadyValor @lady_valor_07]

Don’t mention your age. Name a band that was popular when you were in high school.

I’ll go first Guns and Roses

[Ryan Shead @RyanShead]

Donald Trump forced himself on New York City last night like it was 13-years-old.

[Jen Stewart Garman @jenrenstewart]

@MrChainsaw23 @RalphGarman It’s available in ALL countries!! :-) it will print and ship local to you ❤️

[Chaz @MrChainsaw23]

@RalphGarman Amazing work @jenrenstewart 🧠✏️

I hope it'll become available on Amazon UK. My wife would love this !

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

My beautiful, talented wife is now an AUTHOR! Pick up a copy of her new book, CALM & CREATIVE! Think you're not creative? Let Jen show you how WRONG you are! It's a fun, engaging book for all ages. Get it on Amazon here TODAY: https://t.co/4LO09OyzLb

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

Only a few tickets left for THE RALPH REPORT Live! This Saturday, June 13th, 2026 at 9:30 PM! At FLAPPERS COMEDY CLUB in Burbank, CA! Get your tix here: https://t.co/NlK7zjZ0um

[The Ralph Report Fanpage @TRRFanPage]

Freeze dried fruit is just regular fruit that refused to give up. Just like #TheRalphReport on a Monday with @RalphGarman, @EddiePence & Queen J.

Join the #Garmy on @Patreon: https://t.co/65gQ3Db076

[The Ralph Report Fanpage @TRRFanPage]

G’day #Garmy! Friday on #TheRalphReport hits different down under and everywhere else with @RalphGarman, @EddiePence & Queen J! Crikey, what are you waiting for? Tune in!

Join the @Patreon: https://t.co/65gQ3Db076

[The Ralph Report Fanpage @TRRFanPage]

Step 1: Disconnect the battery. Step 2: Unbolt the old wheel. Step 3: Tune into #TheRalphReport with @RalphGarman, @EddiePence & Queen J.

Join the #Garmy on @Patreon: https://t.co/65gQ3Db076

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

It's THE RALPH REPORT Live! Saturday, June 13th at @FlappersComedy in Burbank, CA! Join me, @jenrenstewart and @eddiepence! Get your tix here: https://t.co/NlK7zjZ0um

[Frank Conniff @FrankConniff]

Soon:

“I’m Scott Baio.”
“I’m Patricia Heaton.”
“I’m Kevin Sorbo.”
“I’m Roseanne Barr.”
“I’m Andrew Tate. Those stories, plus Tony Hinchcliffe, tonight on 60 Minutes.”

[The Ralph Report Fanpage @TRRFanPage]

Nobody opens a can of Bush’s Baked Beans and has a bad time. Same energy as #TheRalphReport on a Monday with @RalphGarman, @EddiePence & Queen J. Roll that beautiful bean footage.

Join the #Garmy on @Patreon: https://t.co/65gQ3Db076

[Gary Miereanu @SuperPRGuy]

Define irony:
Pratt accuses Einbinder of being “completely insulated from the horrors” of LA streets … from the comfort of his $1,500-a-day suite at the Bel-Air Hotel.😳

[ralphgarman @RalphGarman]

Yeah, @spencerpratt is a snowflake manchild.

[Variety @Variety]

Spencer Pratt replied to Hannah Einbinder's comments about his campaign, writing on X that the "Hacks" star was speaking "from a literal red carpet, surrounded by armed security, completely insulated from the horrors on our streets that Angelenos and their kids have to suffer through every day." https://t.co/Pa4sSbCa8l