sloth

I'd rather be dangling from a tree branch in the jungle eating avocados. Slowly.

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@aaronpaul_8 @BryanCranston bouta pass through Albuquerque where’s the best spot to eat

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@CNN @julianzelizer @CNNOpinion What does a tiddy grab gotta do with political parties again?

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@Spotify I hope that subscription price increase is going straight to the artists

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@josh9171 @Lance210 Don’t swap max. Swap a little less

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

Thanks for the large fry @CarlsJr

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@ChaseSupport I actually have no clue, I love banking with you guys but it was prob something shady y’all did

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

Hate u @Chase

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

I mean I don’t believe you but what the hell I just financed a car I’ll take the 9k

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@Target your good & gather line has some of the best stuff I’ve ever eaten and drank but y’all gotta drop the cucumber mint sparkling water

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@alwayssunny I got a sweet episode idea hit me up

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@PayPal stop stealing my money

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@Hertz Yes please

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@hertz why did your customer service rep hang up on me

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@JimCarrey did it first @PostMalone

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@Apple please go back to your old voice memos layout. I use it everyday and the update is more difficult to title, send, edit, literally everything. I’ve tried it for 6 months and just can’t.

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@ni_coke NICOLE IM JUST SEEING THIS FOR THE FIRST TIME RN THIS IS ADORBZ I LUV U

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@trevorcash @iameden Dude I️ just heard gold a few days ago and then played it 17 more times in a row so good

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@ChrisBourne 1/4 century old bitch how does it feel

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@neiltyson Happy bday I like ur brain

[sloth @RatherBeASloth]

@Jeopardy I'm from the east coast and have never once heard anyone in my life pronounce "sherbet" without the R. Know ur country's dialects.