Designer of kit worn by World Cup and Olympic champions. Co-founder of Spark Design Academy, offering Level 2 qualifications for creative minds. Up the Villaaa!
Should you lie to someone with dementia?
Questions like “Where’s my mum?” or “When am I going home?” can be challenging and emotional for families and carers. Dementia can affect how a person experiences time and reality, so what feels true to them in that moment may be very different from what we know to be true.
Rather than focusing on being right, it can help to focus on the feelings behind the question. Offering reassurance, comfort and understanding can often be more important than correcting facts. This could look like:
- "No, your mum isn't coming. She died years ago." Vs "You seem to be thinking about your mum today. What was she like?"
- "Nobody has stolen your handbag." Vs "That sounds worrying. Let's see if we can find it together."
- "You're retired. You don't need to go to work." Vs "You always worked hard. What did you enjoy most about your job?"
Every situation is different, and there is no right or wrong way to respond to difficult questions.
If you're supporting someone living with dementia, remember to be kind to yourself too – caring can be rewarding, but it can also be incredibly challenging.
[Image description: A light blue infographic with text centred in a white circle that reads “What to do when someone with dementia asks a difficult question”. Surrounding this are four separate points that read: Acknowledge feelings (validate how they feel, even if the facts aren’t as they believe); offer comfort and reassurance (a kind response can help reduce anxiety and distress); listen to what they're really saying (it may be a need for reassurance, comfort or connection); and gently redirect if needed (change the focus to something positive or enjoyable). Each point is illustrated with an icon, such as a heart, an ear, a person hugging, and arrows.]
A Coritiba player scored away at Chapecoense in the Brazilian Serie A last night and jumped over the advertising board to celebrate, only to fall down a hole and injure himself… 🫣
After all that, the goal was disallowed too… 😭
#MISSING Keeley • 16 years old • #Bournville
• 5ft 3in tall
• light blue jeans with holes
• black Adidas hoodie with white stripes (as image)
If you can help, call 999, quoting PID 442672