Tanya

Writer. Ultra-endurance athlete and Coach. Restless. I dreadfully lack the personality to be popular on social media.

[Antonio García Martínez (agm.eth) @antoniogm]

The most envious, Marxist, redistributive person in the world isn't the guy busting his hump to frame a house, or the guy grinding out DoorDash...it's the smug guy worth 7 or 8 figures staring at a trillionaire he considers socially beneath him.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

They complain about it for even more attention. The reality is that they’d be even more anxious and insecure if no one did. They also only want “approved” men to look at them; not those (gasp!) average guys at the gym. What they don’t understand is how many people, male and female, actually think they are ridiculous for some of the stuff they wear. And most people just notice others around them and cannot always stare at the ground or wall, particularly in a crowded gym!

[Jay Van Bavel, PhD @jayvanbavel]

This is embarassing for @NYMag -- these "gifted" children were about 30X more likely to acheive eminence than their peers. By any standard that is not a "mirage", but the embodiment of whatever metric identified them as gifted.

It's one thing if their writers don't understand baserates and probabilities, but this should have never gotten through editorial review.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

Most women don’t want a C-section. There is a small percentage of women who would opt for this procedure if given the choice, as most are meant to decrease some sort of risk. Sometimes people just like to broadcast the good things about an unfortunate situation because it can help others deal with it better. Yes, she might be promoting a surgery, but it seems like she’s mostly trying to show off how glamorous she looks during birth (good for her!).

I enjoyed my natural labors, and I absolutely hated my emergency C-section—but my baby lived, so that’s my silver lining.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

@wil_da_beast630 So much of this is just women signaling to other women that they think men suck. What they won’t confront, however, is how dumb it makes them seem AND how many negative encounters with women they’ve had in their lives. Women aren’t usually violent but boy can they be mean.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

Because everyone wants to be intelligent. It is the thing we all know helps make and build a better life, and it is valued by almost everyone to some degree. Athletic talent isn’t universally valued. It’s easier to accept someone who is gifted athletically when you’re not interested in being an athlete.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

I don’t think there was fraud, however, it is the optics that matter to the public here. It simply looks suspicious—even without all the social media commentary. California could address this and increase credulity by focusing more on transparency and tightening deadlines. They could also end universal unsolicited mail-ins.

Some people will always suspect foul play if their candidate doesn’t win, but at least there would be fewer issues to blame. We always hear about CA being so blue that it’s causing non-progressives to leave while with the same breath saying there’s cheating if a Republican doesn’t win.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

The benefits from in-person socializing evaporate when people replace it with virtual moments. In action, it feels engaging, but the health boosts aren’t as enduring and the quality suffers. But it’s easy and nearly always at least mildly entertaining, dampening the drive to seek real people out or cultivate new hobbies and habits.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

A body does not make a person. It’s living, but it’s not what makes the person. I’m not going to persuade someone so committed to their belief that any termination is unethical and amounts to murder because I regard the sacredness and what amounts to life differently.

Should people be forced to keep a child that they know might cause them such tremendous sadness, resentment, depression, etc. to the point that they might not even be a good parent? Do you know how hard it is for some parents to even have patience for normal kids?

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

Prospective parents want healthy children. They don’t just want a body; they want a meaningful, evolving relationship with a child that will go on to hit the major milestones we expect of people. If presented with a diagnosis of severe disability, most parents are simply valuing their future children and life more than the struggle and cost a severely disabled child would bring. They are willing to tolerate that “murder” to protect their future.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

The difference is that there is usually an expected relationship built beforehand. Knowing the person you are bringing into the world may suffer—and, in many cases, cause a great deal of suffering for the family—changes the value that is placed on the life. I believe it is murder, yes. It is knowingly killing a developing life. But the cost is too great to accept and it becomes a tolerable termination. It doesn’t mean there isn’t grief or even guilt, but the desire for a child who will grow up to experience and contribute to the world as one hopes overrides all of it.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

@RealDianeYap I think it’s mostly the women making these decisions and having their partners support them. Women constantly evaluate how decisions will impact their futures—perhaps with concerns that are different from men, but they are still fully capable of doing it.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

I have a rare pregnancy blood disease (FNAIT) and even the doctors advised against having more babies—even knowing with treatment the baby has a great chance of being healthy. When too many of your resources and time need to go to one child, the rest suffer and you simply will need more help to have more kids. Some people have never experienced the hardship of a child with severe complications and they imagine it’s all a blessing. The child can truly suffer. The family, including other children they have, suffers. It’s not a good life for many. A lot of people recognize they aren’t equipped to handle it and would be worse people. Recognizing that is good, in my opinion.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

I’ve heard of this happening, too. That’s why I’m actually an advocate for healthy couples to just decide to do it, even if someone isn’t in the mood. Pencil it in and do it. Getting past the whole awkwardness can actually reveal how it is fun and enjoyable, making the woman more likely to do it more.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

It is a big piece for so many men. I’m not saying that’s bad, but it’s not usually a priority for women in longterm relationships—particularly if they are busy with kids and a job. It’s not just the sensation part; men also like knowing their wife/gf wants them and chooses them in that way.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

Oh 100%!! That is literally why my son throws a fit every time. He wants to just sit next to his sisters. Better yet, he wants to be able to climb around the seats while I’m driving. He tries everything he can to prevent strapping him down. To be honest, I hate that new cars have alarms because I would rather not wear my seat belt also.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

Usually conflicts arise between women who feel competitive with one another and they haven’t yet resolved the hierarchy issue. Women are generally nice even go women they don’t like out of decorum and then talk about them later. If she struggles with finding female friends, it’s probably that she’s cold and unwilling to make an effort.

[Tanya @RelhatsT]

@Brady_H Wouldn’t it be more in relation to kJ? Wouldn’t you want to match work and not just mechanical stress?