Cody Sanford

Warning: May contain strong language and some adult situations, viewer discretion advised.

[rantt @ranttmedia]

After being asked about Critical Race Theory, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff General Mark Milley delivers an answer every American should watch.

[Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys]

Putin’s a fucking wimp. Bring on the Armageddon, asshole. You think you know bleak, motherfucker? We are Arby’s.

Please enjoy Arby’s.

[Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt]

I mean, you’re already screwed when @RepKatiePorter brings out the white board. When she adds different colored Post-Its? Just lie down. Wow. I love her.

[Cody Sanford @RevCodyJ]

Thank you Faithless for spending 666 minutes with me this year on @Spotify. You are my #1. #2020Wrapped https://t.co/7D0diDxMXy

[Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys]

With all this horror and chaos and uncertainty swirling around us these days it’s important to remember that you’re an irrelevant speck of temporary sentience who will die no matter what happens.

Please continue to enjoy Arby’s

[Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys]

This may the 4th as the world dies all around you and you take solace in pretending that liking the biggest entertainment property in the history of humanity makes you interesting somehow, remember, this existence is like rogue one: everyone dies at the end

Enjoy Arby’s

[Cody Sanford @RevCodyJ]

Yep.

[The Daily Show @TheDailyShow]

Hannity. Rush. Dobbs. Ingraham. Pirro. Nunes. Tammy. Geraldo. Doocy. Hegseth. Schlapp. Siegel. Watters. Dr. Drew. Henry. Ainsley. Gaetz. Inhofe. Pence. Kudlow. Conway. Trump.

Today, we salute the Heroes of the Pandumbic.

[Brigid Kemmerer (maybe, maybe not) @BrigidKemmerer]

I need a name for the mood that is just Geralt from The Witcher saying "Fuck."

[Cody Sanford @RevCodyJ]

I am Cody, God of the last time

[Cody Sanford @RevCodyJ]

Border wall emergency = Reichstag Fire

[Senator Chris Coons @ChrisCoons]

I’ve been hearing @realDonaldTrump and @RudyGiuliani claiming that ‘collusion is not a crime.’ Well, I took the liberty of reading the U.S. code myself. Here’s what the law actually says:

[Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys]

Here at Arby’s we’d like to wish you all a happy Easter, the day the son of god rose again, in fulfillment of the scriptures.

April fools: there’s no god, death is forever and the bunny is your mom.

Eat Arby’s

[MSD Alumni @MobilizingMSD]

#NeverAgain #MSDStrong

[Andrea Hahn @AndreaMHahn]

“I skied back to the Pole again … to take this photo for all those men who commented ‘Make me a sandwich’ on my TEDX Talk,” she wrote. “I made you a sandwich (ham & cheese), now ski 37 days and 600km to the South Pole and you can eat it xx.” https://t.co/gbcNQVrCgr

[James Patrick Stuart @japastu]

I used to drink “too much” coffee. Now I drink the right amount. I still drink the same number of cups per day... it’s just that my attitude has changed about it.

[Amanda Palmer 🎹 @amandapalmer]

SOME OF THOSE THAT HOLD OFFICE / ARE THE SAME THAT BURN CROSSES. https://t.co/wDydWxwjq9