The Lost Hardwicke

Guys, I'm lost in New Mexico.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

You know guys, I have decided something today. I have decided I don't like the U.S. Postal Service. They didn't even put a mailbox up here. Dang it!

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

My name is Robert Hardwicke and I have been social distancing since 2004. No joke.

That said, where is Dad

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Bad news, guys. I'm still lost in New Mexico.

Now, it's not the end of the world though, I will give you that.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

But, I'm lucky to be surrounded by snow and ice, because they'll make the swelling go down. Not a bad deal, if you ask me.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

That said, my fists really hurt now. Almost as much as after I punched that kid one time for making a Yo Mama joke.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

I picked the acorns off the forest floor and mashed them all by hand. With my bare fists. Just like my dad and my uncles used to do.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Well guys, I have a new invention. Not even kidding. It's ACORN BUTTER

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Guys, I wish I knew German right now. I would say "I am lost in the forest." I bet that would sound really cool in German, not even kidding.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Wondering if postmillennialism or amillennialism is true. Maybe it depends on what Dad says. Where is Dad

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

could really go for some acorns

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Thinking a lot about the "shining city on a hill" that Ronald Reagan used to talk about. Wherever it was, it sure wasn't Lubbock. No joke.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Ronald Reagan was the best President. Dad said so. Where is Dad

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Ronald Reagan would never have gotten lost

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

It's Presidents Day. I'm celebrating the greatest President, Ronald Reagan. He was the best President. Mike Adams said so.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

I'll tell you who would make a great President, my dad would. There hasn't been a piano player in the White House since Truman. No joke.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

Well guys, another day on the mountain.

What should I do today?

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

You think you hate winter storms.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

No matter who becomes President, America is still a beautiful country. Take my word for it. I can see it all from up here. Not even kidding.

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

I wonder if George W. Bush got reelected

[The Lost Hardwicke @RHinNM]

This would be a great place for the next climate change summit. Not even kidding. Except climate change is dumb.