Facilities just sent me an email asking why the server room temperature is set to 62°F.
They said it's "excessive" and they want to raise it to 68°F to save on cooling costs.
I replied with a six-paragraph email explaining "thermal load balancing," "equipment MTBF degradation," and "catastrophic failure risk."
I cited a "study" that showed every degree above 65°F reduces server lifespan by 15%.
There is no study. I made that up.
But I CC'd the CFO and said if Facilities wants to take ownership of a potential $200K hardware replacement due to overheating, they're welcome to adjust the temperature.
Facilities backed off immediately.
Here's the truth: the servers would be fine at 70°F. Data centers run hotter than that all the time.
But I like the server room at 62°F. It's the only place in the building where I can go to cool off and get some peace and quiet.
Plus, now I have an email chain proving that I "advocated for infrastructure longevity" while others wanted to "cut corners."
Technical decisions are rarely about what's right. They're about who's willing to use more jargon.
Someone just submitted a ticket asking why their laptop is running slow.
I remote in. They have 3 Chrome windows open with 60+ tabs total.
I close all but 5 tabs. Computer runs fine now.
I write in the ticket: "Resolved - Optimized system memory allocation and cleared background processes."
They reply: "Wow, thank you! What was wrong?"
I reply: "Just some resource management issues. Should be good now."
I didn't lie. I just used technical language to describe "you had way too many tabs open."
If I say "close your tabs," they'll feel scolded. If I say "optimized memory allocation," they'll feel helped.
Same result, better optics.
Also, they'll probably open 60 tabs again next week and submit another ticket.
And I'll "optimize" it again.
This is called job security.
@NthandaManduwi@michiganstateu I was shocked when I learned that I could swipe my university ID to pay for my purchases and withdraw cash if I wanted to. Then I stayed months without touching a dollar bank note 😂