Roxy Weller

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

For the past 2 months, I've been mildly obsessed with the existence of mushrooms. I feel like they know more than they are telling us... #mushroomtwitter #mushrooms #mushroom

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

@thelaurenest It's similar to the difference between "like" and "like like"

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

@thelaurenest I think they should be flatish and out of recycled shoes and asbestos asbestos. Steak knives for arms and legs. Can you make the eyes like pez dispensers for white pills?

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

The word "xylophone" has been single-handedly teaching American kids what the letter X is for for decades. That's a lot of pressure.
#xylophone #abcs #alphabet #underappreciated

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

@thelaurenest S̷a̷y̷ ̷i̷t̷ ̷l̷o̷u̷d̷e̷r̷ ̷t̷h̷e̷ ̷p̷e̷o̷p̷l̷e̷ ̷i̷n̷ ̷t̷h̷e̷ ̷b̷a̷c̷k̷.̷
Walk to the back and kindly inform those folks as well.

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

Why hair? #why #hair #butwhy

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

Would not mind a federal law capping the number of hours of work meetings you can have in a week. Can we shift the regulation on women's bodies over to this please? Thx

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

I don't care what you say: ice cream can be lunch AND dinner. Don't let haters bring you down. #icecream #mealplanning

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

I used to think a hyperbole was just a Super Bowl on amphetamines. #misreadwords #English #SuperBowl #football #thingsthatdontrhyme #butshould

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

The other day it rained, and I stared out the window at our yellowing lawn and said to no one in particular "It rained. We needed that."

So I've officially leveled-up to suburban dad status. Where can I claim my free NB sneaks? #thingsdadssay #fatherhood #rain #lawn

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

If you're a 30+ year-old woman and not playing Minecraft, what are you even doing?

[Minecraft @Minecraft]

It’s here! Brimming with life, laughter, and more blocks than ever: Caves & Cliffs: Part I is now out on Java and Bedrock!

↣ https://t.co/TB9PfiPLOP ↢

[Roxy Weller @RoxyWeller]

I don't know you and you don't know me, but I'm going to kick off this account with something controversial: I prefer 🍈honeydew over cantaloupe🍈 #fightme #unpopularopinion #honeydewrocks