Coralynn Nydokus

Sub Par at Best

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

@CanadianTire The new Lloydminster location is beautiful and all my staff interactions have been great! But... is this a real snowblower in the middle of the kids stuff?

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

My toxic trait is leaving my clothes in piles behind the bathroom door and then becoming enraged that the door won’t stay open all the way.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

@KensingtonBooks My copy of Fatal Burn by Lisa Jackson says Robert Carlyle and not Ryan Carlyle in Chapter 23 and I’m losing sleep over it.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

@Hersheys What.... what is this?

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

You’re telling me Nick isn’t the love child of Zach Braff and Dax Shepard? #LoveisBlind #LoveisBlind2

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

Facebook groups for Moms are my favourite toxin.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

My Boyfriend - “I should be on this show. Everyone would be giving each other flowers and shit and I’d be like, ‘Hey Beaux, I brought you this crab I found from the beach. Oh shit, it’s still alive.’ And then I’d beat this crab to death in front of her”

#TooHotToHandle3

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

Is pig a pork #bacon

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

Sometimes self care is just listening to Does Your Mother Know on blast in the car before going back inside.

And that’s okay.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

Yes, Hank the cat, when I finally have a coffee and a murder podcast on and a baby that isn’t crying is the perfect time to puke on the floor. Thank you for asking.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

Thank you City and Colour for spending 761 minutes with me this year on @Spotify. You are my #1. #SpotifyWrapped https://t.co/OeiVwH7SQH

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

Me : Says something

Boyfriend : Well, you are the cringiest person I know, so it makes sense that you would do that.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

No One :

My Boyfriend : Hey Google, how do you cope with dating a liberal?

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

“I’m glad my brain has basically just stopped functioning completely”
Said no pregnant woman to exist. Ever.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

“EXCUSE ME! Is this ride over? I’d like to get off now.”

- Me screaming to the sky about the world

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

*My boyfriend drinking slurpee with a paper straw*

“I fucking hate turtles”

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

@Wendys Why is the cheese sauce so expensive? Is there gold in it now?

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

“Why are my feet so dirty?” I say aloud as I walk across my hardwood floors that I’ve swept one time in two years.

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

I already ruined my own credit so suck on that scammers

[Coralynn Nydokus @RustedSunshine]

“This show should be called Too Much To Handle, because that’s what it is”
- My Boyfriend, who is apparently not into #TooHotToHandle