Ryan Holmquist

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@JonMcLaren What happened to your Instagram acct?

[PC Building Sim @PCBuildingSim]

Today we’re introducing one of gaming’s most innovative brands to PCBS, welcome aboard @SteelSeries!

Before you check out their virtual goods in our newest patch, celebrate with us for a chance to win some of their best gear in real life: https://t.co/oltD89DTtw

#ForGlory

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@DoorDash_Help I predict many people who order delivery through DoorDash because they need to isolate are going to venture out tonight and pick up their own orders because of your service outage. Putting people at risk. This happens too frequently. Shame on you, DoorDash.

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@ChrisHogus You've got some awesome tracks on Monomals. Could listen to your latest "Exploding Zombies" all day. Congrats on getting the attention of Tee Lopes too, by the way. Keep making music ✊

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@alunimoons Ah dang. I was like 30 away from getting in... Thanks for hosting though!

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@batsuits @alunimoons Same 😬

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

He is risen, hallelujah! Happy Easter from our home/place of work/place of worship/jail cell to yours! @ Saint Louis Park, Minnesota https://t.co/llmpUKnKlK

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

Happiest of birthdays to my beautiful bride! Here’s to many more years of laughter, compassion, growing ever closer and being shaped more like Jesus. I love you more than words can describe ♥️
.
All 📷: destinmodina https://t.co/gsFR4DPcEJ

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

Custom-designed fruit signs! Organize your farm! MA-9688-8887-5963 #AnimalCrossing #ACNH #NintendoSwitch

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

This Bunny Day crap is so aggressively in my face. Literally. #AnimalCrossing #ACNH #NintendoSwitch

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

During quarantine, I:

❌ finished a creative project

❌ read a book

❌ finally launched that blog

✅ helped a raccoon dog launder money through a Fyre Festival scenario except people actually move to the deserted island

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

My social feeds during quarantine

- Friend doing a puzzle
- Couple playing board games
- Dogs
- Food
- Outdated ad: “BRING THE WHOLE FAMILY OUT TO OLIVE GARDEN!”

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@TCFCares The Pay & Transfer experience in the mobile app really needs some work. Attached a few screenshots with my complaints. Thanks.

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

@TVsJonDore Great show tonight at @AcmeComedyCo and I hope the second show is free of interfering smartasses. Felt bad for ya, but you had the wit to turn it into comedy – you controlled it well! Sign of a truly good comedian. Please come back to MN soon!

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

A game for Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend:

Take a shot every time Conan calls himself a Belgian woman, mentions his disproportionate legs or torso, or says his skin is so white that it’s translucent

ROLFing at work while listening to this podcast. So well done! @earwolf @TeamCoco

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

10 minutes into the Lyft ride, can’t think of anything to say, and you dare not breathe because the paralyzing silence is almost welcoming

Then you get dropped off and pass out on the sidewalk

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

Your friend posting one last deep thought before leaving social media, just to come back a month later

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

What we don’t need: a #PrincessBride remake

What we need: “Feminists react to Portlandia feminist bookstore sketches” + over 100 stupid video ideas I have

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

My dog is keeping secrets from me

He’s IllumiNAUGHTY

[Ryan Holmquist @RyanHolmquist]

If school is supposed to help prepare us for the working world, a simple email with “sorry for the delay” should do the trick for late homework