Ryan Mahaffey

Follow me if you enjoy occasional half-jokes, incessant sarcasm and sincere praise for pierogies and all things Muppet.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

We cannot begin to process or verbalize how incredibly shattered we are at the loss of our beautifully vibrant Mother, wife, sister, aunt, cousin, co-worker and friend. This cannot be real. This wasn't supposed to happen. We love you to the moon and... https://t.co/SZKexrxZDw

[Paul Rudnick @PaulRudnickNY]

Sometimes I like to stand outside the windows of Florida classrooms and re-enact the Stonewall riots using hand puppets

[Jon Cooper 🇺🇸 @joncoopertweets]

BOOM! A group of students and LGBTQ+ advocates have SUED Florida and Ron DeSantis in federal court to STOP the "Don't Say Gay" law.

Raise your hand if you stand with them 100%! 🖐️

[Jack Cocchiarella @JDCocchiarella]

Disney should PERMANENTLY cut off campaign contributions to Ron DeSantis.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@Jen__Cody Break legs!

[Paul Rudnick @PaulRudnickNY]

Kayleigh says to "fight the darkness" we must "fill the world with Christian babies."
Can the Jewish babies act as agents and managers of the Christian babies?
If a Christian baby turns out gay, can it be returned for store credit?
Is Kayleigh's band called Hitler's Toddlers?

[Jack Cocchiarella @JDCocchiarella]

If Ron DeSantis is so upset with Disney, he should stop accepting campaign contributions from them.

[Paul Rudnick @PaulRudnickNY]

Openly gay Apple CEO Tim Cook has a restraining order against a woman who’d been stalking him and demanding sex. The woman just showed up at Lindsey Graham’s home and demanded his recipe for Lady Baltimore cake

[Jack Cocchiarella @JDCocchiarella]

Ron DeSantis says Disney “crossed a line” by denouncing the Don’t Say Gay bill.

I think Ron DeSantis crossed a line by signing the Don’t Say Gay bill.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@jasonmil70 @matt98443926

[Middle Age Riot @middleageriot]

DID YOU KNOW? Republican orgies often have live music.

[Gen-Z for Change @genzforchange]

Nobody is forcing straight kids to be queer.

We just want queer kids to survive.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@jasonmil70

[Paul Rudnick @PaulRudnickNY]

Republican Oscars:
Most Evil - Ron DeSantis
Most Pathetically Needy - Marco Rubio
Best Performance By A Neo-Nazi Tree Stump: Marjorie Taylor Greene
Lifetime Achievement In Confusion: Susan Collins
Most Likely To Be Arrested Near A Schoolyard: Matt Gaetz tied with Jim Jordan

[Jack Cocchiarella @JDCocchiarella]

Ron DeSantis just said Clarence Thomas is the greatest living Justice.

I didn’t know I could hate DeSantis more, but I was wrong.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

Love you Pearlie Mae!

[Classic Movie Hub @ClassicMovieHub]

Born Today, Mar 29, in 1918, Singer/Actress Pearl Bailey - Carmen Jones, That Certain Feeling, Porgy and Bess...

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@DirectorJz

[Paul Rudnick @PaulRudnickNY]

To anyone who claims Florida's Don't Say Gay bill isn't aimed at LGBTQ people: will teachers be fired if they mention their heterosexual spouses, or promote straight marriage? No, but LGBTQ teachers are forbidden from saying anything about their "orientation"

[Jack Cocchiarella @JDCocchiarella]

Twitter just asked me if I meant to call Ron DeSantis a “piece of shit.”

Yes. Yes, I did.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@FoodNetwork Angel food cake- especially around Easter. Add an overload of Cool Whip & some tropical fruit!

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@KlotzBarone Dried fruits, chocolate, honey ham, Turkey, pepperoni, various cracker flavors and sweet, light cheeses.

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@FoodNetwork White chocolate

[Ryan Mahaffey @ryran75]

@FoodNetwork Tropical flavor jelly beans