I find male transphobes particularly predatory because their argument often comes down to some stranger I wanted to have sex with owed me that body. This is just more rape culture. What someone does with their own body is a "crime" because he desired & wanted to use it.
Also I know it may be news to some and not to others but I find men who are metrosexual/bi/pansexual very very sexy and extremely enjoyable to play with and in general be around- why not? We share some deep understandings and I myself am Bi/Pansexual. If I can peg my guy and do all the things to him he can do to me (respectively) and I know he understands how much I love no holes barred etc bc he himself enjoys it- there’s this amazing freedom from shame or guilt that just not only opens the sexual part of the relationship completely up, it also makes the rest of the relationship so comfortable and relaxed. Like that there are no barriers and honesty and safety in that space is really a beautiful thing…
Let the past go. Forgive yourself. Choose a different timeline. Or change.
Do whatever you need to move forward. The rest of your life is waiting for you.