Lisa

Please stop being nice to me because I will have to be nice back to you and that's fucking exhausting.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Please stop being nice to me because i will have to be nice back to you and that's fucking exhausting.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

I'm in Thailand now you guys. There are like prostitutes everywhere.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

So is Rob Delaney finally considered funny on Twitter now.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Never get mad at me because I will get mad at you for getting mad at me.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

@bazlyons I'll try.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Had such a great day I almost tweeted about it.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

@DavidOzmund Jess?

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Currently searching for a social media site where I can post pictures of food I'm eating.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

I'm in China now you guys, there's Chinese people everywhere.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Use yoga ball as a home furniture to know how it feels like to be adopted.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

One man's top tweet is another man's stolen tweet.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

You're really dumping me? But I pretended to like Sushi for you.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Best part of waking up is going back to sleep again.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

I don't really like rape jokes, they always seem forced.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

When I'm bored I correct typos and grammatical errors inside dicktionarys.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

I'm in Japan now guys there's like sushi everywhere.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Yeah go ahead and briefly touch my abdominal if it makes you happy oh no it tickles please continue and proceed to give me sex.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Just because I'm Asian doesn't mean that your Engrish is better than mine.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Do Chinese people ever get excited about sex or are they too busy making more Samsung phones.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Glee but minus the gay vibes and more interracial group sex.

[Lisa @Schroofles]

Drink like someone's dying. Eat like no one's paying. Fuck like someone's watching.