Scott Blumen

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@AJCassavell Now Martin Maldonado.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@annieheilbrunn Or Plan MM-Martin Maldonado. How exciting. 🙈

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@Tljefferson23 You mean you’re not excited at the possibility of signing Spencer Torkelson?

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@sdutKevinAcee No production whatsoever at C until Sanchez/Campusano arrived. Same at DH. Grisham and Cronenworth hitting below the Mendoza line. Spotty middle relief. Awful trades at the deadline. Snell and Hader could have been moved, but we were in it to win it. This is Melvin’s fault????

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@talkingfriars No bueno.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@pattonoswalt He forgot to include Houston Astro.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@nick_underhill Baby got...BACK.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@pattonoswalt @tammygolden ANYONE CAN GROW UP AND BECOME PRESIDENT. TAKE KEVIN SPACEY, FOR EXAMPLE.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

ANYONE CAN GROW UP AND BECOME PRESIDENT. TAKE KEVIN SPACEY, FOR EXAMPLE.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

The leading cause of divorce in couples over 55 is fighting with the Nest thermostat mobile app.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

What I would give to hear Stuttering John ask Sheriff Joe Arpaio if he prefers corn or flour tortillas.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

The White House replaced the surgeon general w/a nurse. Can they explain the wisdom of wearing a belt and suspenders on the gym treadmill?

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@pattonoswalt Trump's cabinet= 4y(Rush Limbaugh+Curt Schilling)/Billy Graham) x Jerry Springer. Y=Wile E. Coyote.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

Trump's cabinet= 4(Rush Limbaugh+Curt Schilling)/Billy Graham x Jerry Springer)

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@chargersdad Atlanta Falcons. I'm giving mine to the homeless

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

I'm going to send all my holiday mail order catalogs to the political telemarketers.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@sdutKevinAcee @sdut -you mean coach pillowgrabber?

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

@sdutKevinAcee You mean coach pill

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

The 2016 presidential election-worse than kissing your sister-it's more like marrying her, her whole family, & moving to a trailer park.

[Scott Blumen @ScottBlumen]

I liked a @YouTube video https://t.co/ikc6JJzAJ7 “Trumped" Starring Matthew Broderick & Nathan Lane