Billy

Hi, I'm Billy and I'm a bit of a scumbag...

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Why is it spelt "camouflage" and not ?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@philipttirino @realDonaldTrump But they didn't realise he was the dumb guy

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@realDonaldTrump Probably because he's not being paid by @NBCUniversal to advertise for them

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@realDonaldTrump Are you dumb?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Is @instagram broken? None of the pictures are loading, they're just all black boxes

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@realDonaldTrump I heard @nbc announced that a Law & Order: Special Victims Unit spin-off will be coming soon. Are you looking forward to it?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Journalism in 2020 is just copy and pasting yesterday's news and increasing a few numbers

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

April Fool's Day this year will just be everyone pretending they have Coronavirus

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Imagine waking up from a coma to find the world like this

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@chris13harrison Multiples of ten: onety, twoty, threety, fourth, fivety, sixty, seventy, eighty, ninety, onetyty

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Does drinking @corona prevent getting the Coronavirus?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@chris13harrison If you sleep on your front, doesn't the whole pillow suffocate you anyway?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@chris13harrison What is today?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@chris13harrison @Philip_Herbert Do you have troubles eating grapes? Do you suffer from panic attacks from the mere sight of those juicy balls of goodness? Why not try the Silicone Bakeware Grape or Tomato Cutter today for the low price of only £4.99. https://t.co/DXzfR0oBTT Subject to availability. T&Cs apply.

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@chris13harrison If you have a warm shower, you'll be cold when you get out so that'll wake you up. Very smart

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@discordapp Turn it upside down?

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

@chris13harrison @marmite You can contact the Marmite loveline at 0800 0323 656. Lines are open Mon-Fri 8.00am – 6.00pm. Love it or hate it, they're always there

[Billy @ScumbagBilly]

Her: It's not working out between us. For starters, I'm sick of your terrible jokes.
Me: I understand. And for the main course?