Black Eliza

Junior barman and aspiring hospitality magnate.

[Sotheby's @Sothebys]

Our #Impressionist & #ModernArt Evening Sale totaled an exceptional $422.1m, marking the highest total for any auction in our history

[Harold Pinter-Quotes @Pinter_Quotes]

There's no escape. The big pricks are out. They'll fuck everything in sight. Watch your back.

[Harold Pinter-Quotes @Pinter_Quotes]

He was a lousy stinking rotten loudmouth. A bastard uncouth sodding runt. Mind you, he was a good friend of yours.

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

Having sex in a tent can actually improve your sex life.

[Harold Pinter-Quotes @Pinter_Quotes]

A good work of art tends to move me. You follow me? I'm not a cunt, you know.

[Harold Pinter-Quotes @Pinter_Quotes]

The best time to drink Champagne is before lunch, you cunt.

[Scroobius Pip @Scroobiuspipyo]

Who did coffee fuck to get that table named after it? All the other drinks must be pissed over that shit.

[anton newcombe @antonnewcombe]

The rise of the idiots,well stupid.keep it plastic yeah #bbcglasto

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

I hope Howard Webb has his cock chopped off after this match regardless of who wins

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

Not that Bayern's passing is remotely beautiful compared to the One Holy Barcelona

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

Said it countless times before but l express my view again. Beautiful passing and possession is more important to me than even victory

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

Champions League final will be the only fixture I could possibly support Chelsea in. #galacticunts

[QPRnet @qprnet]

Alright, own up. Which one of the Rangers coaching staff has been taking the Bayern set piece sessions this week?

[Liam Gallagher @liamgallagher]

OASIS LG

[Paddy Power @paddypower]

Jimeneze wraps it up with a 71 for the day. But we all know he'll be ending the night with a 69. #MastersSunday

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

Fuck me PSG have some talent

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

Man City can fuck the fuck off

[Black Eliza @Sherbertoh]

Nouveau riche football cunts

[Paddy Power @paddypower]

This is the first time Man Utd have lost 10 games in a Premier League season. David Moyes, just keeps breaking records!

[101 Great Goals @101greatgoals]

Liverpool's Luis Suarez & Daniel Sturridge lead the European minutes per goal chart [Graphic] http://t.co/QUj9uLaecw