Shit Thaniel Says

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

I miss Thaniel.

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

What are these La Crocks cans doing here?

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

I asked for extra onions, but like I winked at her, you know?!

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

Found Thaniel in the back making a dolphin sculpture out of clay. #precious

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

Thanbaby shaved his face. "You know in Spiderman where Peter gets spider grips on his fingers? That's what my face feels like."

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

I think my table is trying to tell me something. They gave me this card to try to find Jesus.
(Also Thaniel has never seen Dogma)

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

There was a squirrel near my house on a dumpster. I named him Toby, but I don't know what his real name was.

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

Look what our baby Thaniel do!

[Oak and Shield @OakandShieldPub]

Thaniel made the most adorable blueberry N/A cocktail today. So cute I almost couldn't drink it!

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

*Internal thoughts* "wait, so were not gonna 'shake it' at a nice restaurant??" *cancels invites*

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

Thaniel: I just tried to think of what that little thing was that I played with as a little boy. It was a Game Boy, but I almost said Playboy.
Emily: Everyone grows up at different rates.

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

If a poltergeist steals something, is that a poltergeist or a polter-heist?

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

This is what happens when you call and hang up on Thaniel.

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

"I just spilled my beer on myself. I should do something different next time."

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

"Which one is that? Aquaman? Because that's the one that does it for me."
#aquaman

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

Thaniel is okay, the doctor says he needs a bit of r&r, but he'll be good in a few days. He's planning on going home and cuddling his dog, Max.
#dog #love #bork #pupper

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

Today, as Thaniel bent down to pick up garbage near the dumpster, the air pushed the dumpster door and he stood up and smashed his head. Thaniel went to Urgent Care, and has a concussion.

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

From earlier: "My mom's gonna be so mad at me."

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

"If someone held me down and put a towel of cazadores over my face, I'd be so happy."

[Shit Thaniel Says @ShitThanielSays]

//Gavin drops post it notes and accidentally splits them from the group

Than: "Once you've split them they'll never be whole again!"