ShmalienMonkey

Fuck you,
No seriously
Fuck you

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

Who tf took my pants off at t mobile

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

I fucking hate the Tuesday scaries

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

When the bartender says she thinks you’ve had enough

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

@heatdaddy69420 🥀🥀🥀

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

Me looking for the no tip option after being a complete pos all night

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

Me and you girl. We go together like vodka and milk🥚

[Bob Stauffer @Bob_Stauffer]

📍Vegas

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

@heatdaddy69420 We’re a cunt hair away from the first practice

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

@CodifyBaseball Bad idea, they won’t be able to find the ball

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

I love standing down wind from my coworkers cigarettes

[Carter Acton @carteracton]

This game is insane I am hammered god I love Canada #INONE

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

@heatdaddy69420 tu eres el hombre

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

I’m a giver until it comes to orgasms, then you can call me the evil Mr. Beast.

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

Every. Damn. Day.

[OG Anunoby Burner @yungpapi_96]

Me walking to get a condom from the bathroom after she doesn’t let me dog it raw

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

I have a itch that only a foreign chick can scratch.

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

Party Bus! but it’s just me driving around blacked out.

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

I didn’t want to be the drunkest person in Arizona last night but someone’s gotta do it.

[ShmalienMonkey @ShmalienM]

@yungpapi_96

[Rob Gucci @heatdaddy69420]

Loyal to the oil.