Sleazy Professor

Tenured Professor ... teaching other aspiring males how to sleaze to the top!

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

When I prance to work tomorrow, should I opt for "relaxed my-balls-need-space walk" or "muted elegance of advanced age" vibe to impress employees with my bodily presence? #catwalk #scholar #professor #phd #bodypositive #respect #leadership #academia #phd #BossLady #ageism #uni

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Biting my nails with excitement: The future is wild: Will #ICE be gotten rid of? Will we all download #guns? Will #india get rid of #gaysexban? #lgbtq #ed #trump #download #Digital #anxiety #nailbiting #academia #scholar #news

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Due to summer heat, I was considering riding to work barechested on a horse à la #putin. Afraid though young females will flee me upon realizing how little Karate I do. Better to don a #trump suit? #catwalk #ballroom #competition #academia #phd #academiclife #exzellenzuni #ed

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Why shouldn't that gain everybody's RESPECT?

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

How2sleaze: So I have been having some respect problems with some employees who seem to consider me a scam. I will up my male prestige by flaunting my great relationships to almost nude phd-students at the dptmnt. #ed #nude #girls #phd #academia #scholar #fake #exzellenzuni

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Ethics Question: Is it okay to surreptitiously perform long-term surveillance of certain employees at university? #ed #surveillance #digital #exzellenzuni #academia #phd #desperate #VideoViral #ethics #academicexcellence #Berkeley #digitalethics #academiclife

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

After watching my lazy, spoiled protegés scam along their careers for years, I sometimes have flashs of insight showing me the monsters they've become. O tempora, o mores! #academia #desperation #ed #phd #phdlife #truesight #medium #gradschool #highered #exzellenzuni #revelation

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Yesterday was a boost for me. Totally impressed students by telling them I had known one distinguished professor for 37 years. Who cares about research? I'm buddies with cool. #scholar #maledom #confidence #exzellenzuni #phd #academia #phdlife #gradschool #maleclub #oxbridge

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Skimpy summer attire at college is fuel to the spent charcoal of my aged sexuality. How to rekindle the seductive flames of my composite sleazyprof/middleschool bully charm? Need to be a hero. #ed #flirt #coal #fire #nudity #leadership #exzellenzuni #phd #academia #gradschool

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

#Thailandcave tragedy got me thinking. Is there anyway I can lure intelligent competitors into caves and flood them? I am so desperate; competition aggravates my #ed. #competition #exzellenzuni #phd #academia #academiclife #sexisminacademics #epistemology #exzellenzcluster

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Decided to retweet this bc it was so popular. Fellow academics! Never falter in cherishing your own ill-founded arrogance! #academia #academiclife #phd #phdlife #exzellenzuni #exzellenzcluster #gradschool #academictwitter #qualityresearch #scholar #satireiscancer #sexism

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

If it takes some of my employees ten years longer to finish their work than at other universities, that ultimately means they're the bestest, right? #academia #academiclife #phd #phdlife #exzellenzuni #exzellenzcluster #gradschool #academictwitter #qualityresearch #scholar

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

@LilivonGaran @AcademicChatter Dude - you seriously could not tell that this is a satirical account? #sexisminacademia #academicsexism #genius #exzellenzuni #scholar #satireiscancer #FeminismIsCancer

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

What is sexier on ageing scholars in summer: a lightblue linen blazer with tan pants or dare to bare my scrawny arms in a short-sleeved blouse to draw attention away from the tummy? #girlonfire #sexy #dandy #professor #exzellenzuni #hero #academia #phd #phdlife #scholar

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

Woke up thrilled this morning people are paying taxes for me to desperately attempt to hook up with students. Also recently hired a known pedophile. Makes me feel better! #taxes #academia #academiclife #phd #phdlife #exzellenzuni #exzellenzcluster #gradschool #academictwitter

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

To all the doctors out there: is there a drug I can subtly add to the competitions' drinks? My team and I are seriously too dumb to do research. Secretly making all the conferences pre-read for us is NOT enough. #ed #scholar #stupid #desperate #academia #phd #exzellenzuni

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

@McLNeuro @ratemyprofessor But it's still okay to pressure phd students and postdocs to embrace work-place sexiness, right? #FeminismIsCancer #phd #phdlife #academia #maledom #professor

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

@AngBlkWmnGtgPhD @AcademicChatter I guess I would describe my summer skin tone as "foul apple with the texture of badly aged leather"

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

If you're also fake-tanning to cheat your wrinkles and emanate the professor-gigolo vibe you love, remember to adjust the color to match your summer skin tone. A no-brainer! #gigolo #academia #phd #phdlife #academictwitter #tan #beauty #makeup #maledom #ed #exzellenzuni

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

@MyMentor15 @AcademicChatter Here's some news: Reviews are not really unbiased and objective. Academic politics often play a role. I myself have rigged tons of reviews.

[Sleazy Professor @SleazyProf]

After retirement, should I become a professional....