Standup Batman

I'm the hero the world of standup comedy deserves and the one it needs.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Saying @TonyHinchcliffe fucks a lot of guys is so hack - first of all it’s only one guy and @joerogan fucks him.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

I’m not saying the Jews run Hollywood - but @realjeffreyross has been on dozens of roasts and no one mentions that he fucks kids.

And by fucks kids I mean publicly dated and had sex with a 15 year old.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Hey @GianmarcoSoresi - can you call @realjeffreyross a cunt so we can have a convo about whether or not it’s cunty to date and fuck children?

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

I’m not saying the Jews run Hollywood - but @realjeffreyross has been on dozens of roasts and no one mentions that he fucks kids.

And by fucks kids I mean publicly dated and had sex with a 15 year old.

[Earl Skakel @EarlSkakel]

Which is real?
#netflixisajokefest

[Earl Skakel @EarlSkakel]

I finally found out who .@StandupBatman is

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

We need a @BenBankas vs. @NatalieCuomo Roast Battle - they take turns roasting themselves while the crowd sits in confused horror.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Did he just do crowdwork with the voices in his head?

[Ben Bankas @BenBankas]

Triggered girl at comedy show…

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Everybody hates pedophiles - until Jerry Seinfeld, Chris D’elia or Jeff Ross needs an opener.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Remember @adamcarolla from The Man Show? Looks like he’s the latest has been who thought pivoting to standup would be easy https://t.co/dRL6IPnkQx

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

A Zionist comedian, who exclusively bombs - if nothing else, at least she’s on brand.

[Arynne Wexler @ArynneWexler]

Bad Bunny headlining the Super Bowl is not as bad as you think

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

@Raanancomedy Dang - this didn’t have your patented twist ending, where you beg to go on their podcast and then accept when invited.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Howdy fellow cowboy - you should mosey on down to the Mothership at sundown. I’ve got me a saddlebag full of pronoun jokes, I reckon will tickle yer fancy. There’s none of us left in LA now by the way. I was the last one.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

DMs telling me Hanna Berner stiffs her writers & Jeff Dye is a joke thief. What’s the details?

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

If you’re a male comedian who only talks about your dick - you’re hack peddler of shock schlock and you best learn to get laughs without working blue, if you wanna make it in this biz!!!

If you’re a female comedian who only talks about your pussy - you’re a Filth Queen™!!!

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Remember the backlash against autotune in music? Now comedy needs that - also against autotune, strangely.

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

Omghahalol youre a comic who went on the local morning show and said wild things - you’re just like Norm Macdonald except an unoriginal hack version who’s devoid of talent

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

I need a TikTok hacks vs. Rogansphere hacks war more than I need air to breathe.

[troy bond jr (grand admiral) @TroyHasEbola]

If one more person asks “Troy why haven’t you done kill Tony” as if my response of “he’s a giant hack and a closeted racist” aren’t enough reasons

[Standup Batman @StandupBatman]

.@WhitneyCummings is on the hunt for the arsonists who are melting her face