Weve Stilliams

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

@JessePalmerTV : “this is going to be the most dramatic errand you’ve ever run in the history of errands”

*takes you to the dmv*

[Reductress @Reductress]

How to Be Dominant in Bed Even Though Your Parents Still Send You Care Packages: https://t.co/tPdAjg8uUo

[Two Fifty One @251tweets]

Why I Stopped Washing My Hands, by @Stephenw56.

https://t.co/a6ytYydAyb

[FunctionallyDead @FuncDeadZine]

The corporations have learned some valuable lessons and want you to know. https://t.co/aXzxWuphOV

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

If Joe Biden was French would his last name be Bidet

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

It’s hard for me to hit on people, so I just walk around the city every day looking mysterious and look for my description on Missed Connections.

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

What could be so good about heaven? I never hear anyone talking about Jesus’d Eggs

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

Superb Owl

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

I’ve been trying to manifest a larger penis, any tips?

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

Sticks and Stones may break your bones but my Big Words will drown you in my intellectual prowess

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

Joe Biden bring back Luby’s you coward

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

I like wearing a mask because the copious sweat stains I now get on my face distract people from the also copious sweat stains on my armpits

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

God, I love being ALIVE
(a little introspective, very entitled)

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

THREAD: Is Bill Clinton the original Dancing Queen? (1/49)

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

Sleeping with the door open is like peeing with your pants on

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

I don’t like morning wood, but I’m glad it doesn’t coincide with morning termites.

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

I had a joke written but I keep punching up the fuckline

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

A pilot on AirForce One tried to hijack the plane and kill the president today. Looks like it’s another job by the infamous DB Coup-per.

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

I love Picasso’s Blue Period. It’s almost as good as his Red Hot Chili Peppers Period.

[Weve Stilliams @Stephenw56]

When 2021 is just as bad as 2020 do the autodidact geniuses that said “2020 wasn’t bad out of nowhere 😡” get immediately raptured?