Summer Windsnap

I love watching youtube, playing video games, emo music, art, and all things creepy.
I'm also gay.

[𝕭𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖎𝖊✨ @Bennieeexyz]

Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat.

Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records.

My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now.

Called the county clerk.

Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty.

Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons?

Me: Yes, but he's a cat.

Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county?

Me: He's a legal cat.

Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption.

Me: He can't file anything. He has paws.

Clerk: You can file on his behalf.

Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat."

Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons."

Me: What's the medical reason?

Clerk: He's a cat.

Me: That's not a medical condition.

Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving.

Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later.

"Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement."

Took the letter to my vet.

Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty.

Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty?

Me: Excellent question. No good answer.

Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten.

Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve?

Vet: On what grounds?

Me: He's a cat.

Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings."

Me: Perfect.

Sent it in. Got another rejection.

"Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court."

My roommate thought this was hilarious.

Roommate: Felix is going to jail.

Me: This is serious.

Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens.

Decided that was actually the only option left.

Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters.

Checked in at the courthouse.

Clerk: Name?

Me: Felix Martinez.

Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix?

Me: Yes.

Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat.

Me: I've been saying that for six weeks.

Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption?

Me: I filed three. All rejected.

Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief.

Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation?

Me: Twice.

Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this.

Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me.

Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote?

Me: You tell me.

Supervisor: This is a data error.

Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out.

They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience.

Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry.

Me: Appreciate it.

Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted?

Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats.

Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card.

For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was.

Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud.

Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent.

Roommate: That's what they all say.

Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now.

Fitting end to his legal career.

[Erica Wester @EricaWester]

Adding some KEYCHAINS to my BigCartel shop soon!
https://t.co/h8Ls5Xk3QX

[RubberRoss @RubberNinja]

@party_animals Just a hunch here. But you know how all the artists and creative on your team no doubt told you this was a terrible idea. It is. Fire the dumb ass that pushed for this. He might've tanked this games reputation. Also fuck you.

[Yume @Yumesuki_]

I just had my Twitch channel taken down MID STREAM FOR BEING AN AUTOMATED ACCOUNT?? What??

I've had bots raid my channel but I certainly did not invite any of them @Twitch

[Jp 🦦 @ReadyJohnpaul]

Would anyone know what legal channels I need to go through to get a U.K. Travel ban lifted?

[Potion Craft - Alchemist Simulator @PotionCraftGame]

Greetings,

We've concocted a truly marvellous Holiday Giveaway to celebrate the recent 1.0 release of #PotionCraft! Enter for a chance to win one of our fantastical prizes! 🎁

Enter here: https://t.co/G20OzkINsB

Competition closes 23/12/22 - Good luck!
(T&C's apply)

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@OneTopicAtATime My gender is not a problem

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@dee_redhead I'm the oldest and I did everything in my power to protect my siblings, I blamed myself for everything and beat myself up about things. In return my younger siblings ended up taking their emotions out on me.

[Discord @discord]

@Mysta_Rias

[Pukicho @pukicho]

Who’s the fucking idiot asshole who thought these should be next to each other

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@AetheRecluse Oh you'll cry, but it won't be from the cat. It's so good though. Gonna be achievement hunting it. Beat it in 10 hours on launch. Was freaking amazing

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@SirCutieYuki Origin: spirits of the past. Got naussica vibes

[⚜️ 🄳🄰🅃 🄲🄾🅄🄿🄻🄴 ⚜️🐅 @datcoupleNOLA]

@KiyaShaco I don’t know why my fellow males are having such a hard time grasping this concept

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@rubixmaster7 @weebofsadness @uncool_Remi @ManMilk2 Bruh, it hormones. Your brain does it. XD

[Discord @discord]

which one is correct:

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@roxiqt I had a migraine that lasted 2 weeks. I really should have gone in but no one could take me there anyway.

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@WaffleOutlaw

[Summer Windsnap @SummerWindsnap]

@Mithzan I've started watching a while ago with my boyfriend. Turns out this is his 3 rewatch if the whole thing. This man crazy