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🧵 A New Year's Eve tale:
June 1990
"Hello, could you tell me when the next train to Birmingham is?"
"One moment, ah yes, it's at 1:40."
"Brilliant!"
"People aren't usually this excited about Birmingham."
"I've got a date with Sam, I can't believe it!"
"Have fun young man."
1/12
Bruh, I'm taking a dump in the office toilet...someone drops a SPOON AND KNIFE on the floor, the spoon enters the cubicle. A hand comes underneath the side bit and collects it. Whilst I'm having a poo. I have so many questions. Who brings cutlery to a toilet?