You don’t become queer because of a fantasy or a curiosity.
Queerness is a politic. A lived experience. A practice built upon attraction and enriched by choice.
Once again: a lot of you girls are fake gay and I hate a fake gay bitch :/
Got to the show early and caught the opener. Wonderful indie artist. I stand up from my chair to stretch a bit between sets, my legs still touching it. In comes an older white woman and her guy. She fully reaches around my body to try pick up my chair out from behind me.
Yep. This reminds me of the earlier nuanced differences between being just gay and being genuinely queer. There's an understanding of shared culture, struggles, and joys. But some people wanna be assimilate to cishet-ness as closely as possible.
I wonder if my perspective is off, if I'm not rightly thinking of the humanity of others. So I pour myself into doing wonderful things for people, into paying attention, into being kind. But it doesn't feel like it's returned as much.
Sometimes I wonder if people would actually drink me dry and leave me for dead if I gave them the opportunity. I hate feeling so commodified. But then I cannot keep snatching myself away from every point of connection.
I always feel like my life is against the grain. We having a cultural conversation about how shit men have been that has been a long time coming and deeply necessary. And also, I keep experiencing the endless demands of life and the people in it with little offered in return.