Suzy Katz

😑🙄Bylines: @nytimes @self @huffpost, @bust_magazine, @independent, @insider,@vice & more ✨

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Sooo who is funding my vacation? 🙈

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Me: There’s nothing more tragic than a cishet man.
Also me: He said I’m pretty. 🥺

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Knicks parade is not it. Fight me

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Bf took hundreds and hundreds of airline miles I’ve been hoarding for years for my ultimate European vacation and blew them while drunk. 😭 Cool cool cool

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Since writing doesn’t pay maybe I should become a TSA agent. 😭

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

I hate kids and I don’t want to have to interact with them. Riding the subway with people and their annoying ass kids is the best birth control of all.

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Went from swamp vagina season to so sad it’s hard to get out of bed season real fast 💨 🙄

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Too much sucks so bad. 🤢🤢🤢

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Every celebrity is honest about one procedure. Selective honesty is still curation. Not confession. 👀

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Friends are going to Croatia end of July and I need a vacation desperately. It’s been one shitty experience after another this year. What kind of thotty photos do I need to post to get some funds sent my way??

🫠

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

I spent the weekend doing a showcase so I’m postponing my birthday for another day this week. Good for you bc you can still tribute, bad for me because I get to turn 40 all over again?

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Birthday’s almost here. Now’s your chance to send me a gift. Venmo in bio.

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

A series of family emergencies and traumas this year. Not sure what it is about milestone birthdays but mine always suck. Also not cool that my bday is on Father’s Day this year.

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

@rachtompkins [email protected]

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Looking to speak with a plastic surgeon about blepharoplasty for a potential story. DMs open. #journorequest

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Birthday’s almost here. Now’s your chance to send me a gift. Venmo in bio.

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Beauty is no longer natural. It’s curated, injected, filtered, and financed. My new substack Nip + Thought explores the culture of plastic surgery & the cost of self optimization. Subscribe here: https://t.co/UCp9ouCFKG

💉 ✨

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Been watching too many girls online discuss being delulu and actually achievIng their dreams. So here’s hoping I get some $ends before my birthday.

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

I wrote about my mysterious knee pain bc health is wealth & no editor wants to hire me to write about ✨ culture ✨: https://t.co/sk7FK0YqBx

[Suzy Katz @SuzySometimes]

Is anyone still here?? Should I resurrect twitter? I’m too ugly for TikTok and IG