alexa !!

૮ ˙Ⱉ˙ ა rawr!

[P.Shooter @AllCopsMustDie]

Hate when some fucker says "your break light is out" yeah and my dick is small and I can't wrap blunts either. Dumbass.

[mika @mikasagrada]

Eu depois de colocar no meu currículo que sou extrovertida e sociável

[Eira @GundamDoll]

Clocking into your shift at the getting molested by 35 year old white women factory

[liz @unrequiet]

do you ever have to talk to your mother like shes younger than you does it also make you want to literally kill yourself too

[eren 💾 @zilodak]

Everyone talks about the executive dysfunction part of ADHD but never about how you're more prone to addictions and it can also makes you money-blind.

[꩜ m ꩜ @twoheadedm0th]

i’m so fucking sorry that my ass is so fat and i’m hilarious and my heart is so full of light and love im so fucking sorry

[cutiepia @cutiepia8395]

I just want to point out… the amount of money the U.S. has spent on war in the last 2.5 months is roughly the same cost that Bernie Sanders proposed for universal college. So the real question is never ‘can we afford it’… it’s what we choose to prioritize.

[DenouementLawyer @Itsthatlawyer_]

this was the first coffee bean discovered in Ethiopia in 850 AD

[💕🍭🍬🧁 @beatatrick]

“i was your age once” mom you ain’t never crossed reference his spam following with his spotify following

[presley @g00doldays]

enjoying my onion bagel with jalapeno cream cheese and pumpkin spice coffee

[rory (they/هو) ₊˚⊹ ࿔ @gilhouligan]

i looooove explaining this one to ppl and seeing them get that deer in the headlights look

[🏴🐈‍⬛🌻hijo negro del pueblo 🏴🐈‍⬛🌻 @EcoTechBro]

It's fucking incredible how much of a stink everyone, right and left, makes about 'rising anti-semitism' when this is just how your average conservative is towards muslims.

[tweet deleter @BrittanytB]

When pets use pillows as pillows

[✧æther✧ @ether_ly]

when he asks for a footjob but I lowk have mad callouses and his dick stank so I genuinely just grate his cheese for him 🦶🧀

[alexa !! @T0UGHTITTIES]

thinking about the time a man assaulted me and then immediately afterwards made me watch chris delia stand up with him….idk what was worse

[frankie steins gay uncle @ewkewpid]

i love you leopardus tilcayo

[aj @pessimisticoomf]

when i show up to harrys concert Fat and wearings Jeans

[miz irri @miz_irritating]

The first artist to get deplatformed for being pro-israeli adjacent oh 2020 woke is BACK thank u god

[lex @lexlisbon]

Larping as someone who has their shit together by putting lotion on after my shower