Benjamin DANKlin

I’m a sucker for corn rows and manicured toes

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

I really can't understand for the life of me why they ever did away with cigarette vending machines

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Chop sticks are a dumb ass way to eat food. People still eating with chop sticks need to grow tf up

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

@ChemicalAT No

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Getting your socks wet gotta be top 5 in the “shit that sucks” power rankings as far as I’m concerned

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

At what age does it become appropriate to carry around a pocket full of lozenges at all times?

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Alright everyone throw out some of your favorite slang terms for box. I’ll go first, coin purse. Also beaver.

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

If taking a dump in the urinal is wrong then I don’t wanna be right

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

@BSSportsbook Turk Wendell

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

This old dude on the street told me I had a great 70’s ‘stache earlier. Been chasing that high ever since

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Bald guys got the best hat collections

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Strawberry milkshake for lunch like a true king

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

If you offer me a bite of your half eaten apple imma smack you b

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Scream it from the rooftops 🗣🗣🗣

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Fellas after you’re done eating box tell her “my compliments to the chef”

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

It’s gotta suck for the guy who’s got the second smallest cock in the world. He’s got a tiny penis and doesn’t even get the recognition for being #1.

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Imagine piss smelled like shit? That would really fucking suck man

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

People with glasses think they’re so fucking smart

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Dropping your pants to your ankles at the urinal is such a power move

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

Do people with body odor have any idea how bad they fucking stink? Or are they just oblivious to the rancid stench coming off of them making everyone they come in contact with want to die?

[Benjamin DANKlin @tcISwavy]

It really do be like that though