Lol

One of the most hardest hitting safeties in da league

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

You can poo, you can pee. You can poop, but you can't peep. What's up with that?

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

The autmatic sliding door at the grocery store was broken so I had to open it manually. I held it open for two people who looked at me like I was the dumbest person to ever live. Lol

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

If you care whether your grocery bag is paper or plastic could you stop caring so they'll quit asking me

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

When you try to buy some dumb anime game and accidentally buy all the DLC without the game https://t.co/DoCSEqCgKi

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

Taking my first uber. This dude ain't say one word to me. You know imma find that 5 star button

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

My BFFF saw my shoes under the stall and started talking to me while I was taking a shit. Settle down, pal, it's not Friday yet

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

Me and a coworker are working late on Friday so I told him we'll be BFFF's. #BestFriendsForFriday

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

My coworker showed up 6 hours late at 11:55 and then clocked out to go to lunch at 12. Bruh

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

Some old man asked me if this was an owl and his wife yelled "IT'S POKEMON, JOHN!"

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

Just heard a guy call Thomas the tank engine "Tommy the train" and it legit made me mad

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

.@WheelofFortune thinks phrases are things like "Don't let a rattlesnake into the ol' poultry farm." Bruh that's just a random set of words you strung together for the first time in history.

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

I thought my coworker was just lazy but when our boss saw how little work he did, he got trained to run the CNC machine. What a legend.

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

Corn is my favorite type of vegetable and bread

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

What are we gonna start making our beds every day now? Stop the madness

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

People out here raking leaves like more ain't gonna fall tomorrow smh

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

I changed the time in my car to be correct on Thursday but now it's daylight savings so I guess I'll just wait

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

Have to waste half my day off bringing my car back to the repair place 'cause it's acting weird after they fixed other stuff and I ran over a bolt that stuck in my tire on the way here. They don't fix tires lol

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

@itylercarroll Are you down?

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

@kennyjtanner You don't deserve all that stuff them cats are saying about you

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

@CraigLucie Is what I would say if this was funny. Which it's definitely not.

[Lol @Teh_Flan]

@CraigLucie That's the same name I call my weiner