bullshit, i can clearly see them moving. im really tired of people trying to manipulate me all the time, but i guess i deserve it because of all the bad stuff i did in the past
cats being capable of understanding accidents and even giving you a little head bonk to let you know you're still cool makes it infinitely funnier that they don't understand when you're trying to help them
cats when you step on their tail: i'll admit that was rather ouchie, but given the lifetime of goodwill and trust between us, one must conclude this booboo is but a fluke.
cats when you try to get their claws unstuck from the couch covering: this nefarious bitch has never had a single honorable intention in their dishonest and shameful life, this must be one of their sinster plots or perhaps even an attempt on my life,
Boomer at the Food Lion went out of her way to steal my parking spot. Clearly she failed to notice that my social battery was drained all the way to fucking zero