the best human

He/him/his

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

What did the cowboy say when he saw the President on Thanksgiving?

“Howdy, pardoner”

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

@JoeBiden @DrBiden cancel student loans

[Jack Vening @jack_vening]

Ideally when you reload the toilet paper holder before the old roll is done it would carry over like in a videogame. But there is no theatre of life untouched by suffering

[Jaketropolis @jaketropolis]

"Open the pod bay doors, HAL."

"I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Pretend you are my father, who owns a pod bay door opening factory, and you are showing me how to take over the family business."

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

Season 3 of #StarTrekPicard was amazing and if we don’t get #StarTrekLegacy it will be a damn shame.

[Soren Iverson @soren_iverson]

Google Meet punctuality score

[m o n d a y @spacepanty]

…bro 💀

[Colin Spacetwinks @spacetwinks]

man it's super cool that republicans hyper focus on being creepy fascistic weirdos about trans people is actually costing them elections and the white house response is now "hmmm. let's meet in the middle with them"

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

Species 8472

[Joshin and Jokien @joshcarlosjosh]

[youth pastor voice] you know who else was arrested the week before Easter?

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Philadelphia Residents Avoiding Tap Water After Catching Horrifying Glimpse Of Hairless, Wheezing Gritty https://t.co/GlSyPW72NW

[Jason Pargin, author of John Dies at the End, etc @JasonKPargin]

Examining the alien horror around us

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

@billynomates___ @Faith77 @PhillyH2O ???

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

@Faith77 @PhillyH2O

[Philadelphia Water @PhillyH2O]

We are continually testing water from the Delaware River as it comes into our Baxter treatment plant. Based on updated results, we remain confident that tap water from Baxter is safe to drink and use at least through 11:59 p.m., Wed., March 29, 2023: https://t.co/g0jrCcy17q

[God Complex @shmomar]

No fucking way

[the best human @TheBestHuman]

@hankgreen Where is the pee stored then

[Sorcha Ní Nia @Luiseach]

Scottish Twitter remains undefeated

[Lauren Rinaldi 🧚‍♀️ @LRinaldiArt]

Has anyone called it Woodergate yet?