Paul

I hate pugs.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

Twitter was becoming less smelly lately. Figured I'd come and fix that. #helpfulhobo

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@craighartonline @SteelRunny Twain for president! What? He's what? Oh. That explains a lot.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Ashlynhussey That happened to me, but only because I told everyone to get the hell out of my bedroom.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

The snake isn't hissing because he's mad. He's trying to sound like bacon! #thingsitelllittlekids

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

If cars are just as dangerous as guns, why waste money on a superfluous gun?

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Ashlynhussey I'm sure you have more ass-kickery left in you.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

Sometimes I wish I really did eat kids. It would make me a hero right now.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

That? Give it here. I'mma take it apart. You just...just look over that way for a bit. Heh.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Cewpita Rock the hell ON!

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@FebruaryGrace I adamantly insist you are correct about that!

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

I have this nagging feeling that I owe someone an answer. Did anyone ask me anything recently?

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Ashlynhussey Now THAT'S teamwork! Go team.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Ashlynhussey I keep chocolate and a list of pickup lines in my purse.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Ashlynhussey Everyone's a lesbian. EVEN ME.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

An ideal mate: similar conclusions via different paths. #compatiblyinteresting

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@Ashlynhussey Ha ha Apple products.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

I would enjoy taking antidepressants if the pills were shaped like colorful dinosaurs.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

@craighartonline In theory yes, but you have an inherent awfulness to overcome first, putting you at a disadvantage.

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

I need another follower so I can follow someone else. Have to maintain balance. #socialmediaOCD

[Paul @TheFooDaddy]

In what units does one measure the worth of a person? I propose the adoption of the "giggle:groan" ratio.