In North Korea, heart surgeon. Number one. Steady hand. One day, Kim Jong Un need new heart. I do operation. But, mistake! Kim die! North Korea very mad. I hide in fishing boat, come to America. My big secret: I kill Kim on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
I’m sick to my stomach. Congress just excluded one of the poorest demographics from the largest economic stimulus package in the history of the world. Are you a college student whose parents still claim you as a dependent? Well you get absolutely nothing from the stimulus bill.
I’m going to give away $30,000 to 1 random person who retweets this tweet AND follows Twitter Philanthropist @Pulte and Me!! (If you don’t follow us, we can’t DM you the money) Will show proof! Much love
My wife and I get corona virus. We go to Disneyland and ride California screamin. The park finds out and quarantines us on the coaster and we endlessly ride. We have kids and they grow up on the coaster. It’s all they know. This coaster is our home now. Life is beautiful.
ALERT: CDC officials have advised that wearing a Philadelphia Eagles jersey could protect you from coronavirus after noticing last season that players wearing Eagles jerseys couldn’t catch anything