Scott Parker

Just another guy in witness protection named Scott Parker. We're like neon tetras.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@realDonaldTrump YOU DID THIS. You courted the angry and disenfranchised and told them you could make them great. Now there are guns drawn in the Congress. You have done this to our democracy. No one will ever forget this.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@RickOhyeMD So your choice is to pay either nothing or $20 to get it Tuesday. Makes sense.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAuthorGuy But obviously the dog is French…

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

I bought a 14lb turkey last week at $0.56/lb for $7.84. @jasoninthehouse bought a 160lb turkey? I want to know where he shops…

[Acyn @Acyn]

Chaffetz: We went to go buy a turkey today. It was $90! It’s all a choice by Joe Biden

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@Acyn I bought a 14lb turkey @ $0.56/lb for $7.84. Are you fact checking that Chaffetz bought 160lb turkey?

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAthletic: Thanks for the glow up on @Lions, but no one writing this knows the area: The Pontiac Silverdome was in Pontiac, Michigan. It was not named after a car, but an Odawa War Chief. Read up on him. Do better.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAuthorGuy I think that is too easy. Focus on skunksgiving, stanksgiving,tranqsgiving, spanxgiving…

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@RonFilipkowski Is that a wool suit and a cotton shirt? That is an abomination (Deuteronomy 22:9)

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@JerasIkehorn like the reader if a cautionary tale…

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@barstoolsports Care to comment, @NFL? I am sure you’ll look at the film and see what kind of advantage you gave the home team.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@jimrome If the Chiefs didn’t get a HUGE pass on holding, offsides, and false starts against the Lions it might have been easier to notice what a difficult time they had with pass rushers.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@jimrome That is your takeaway? How about the Super Bowl champs got every non-call they could ask for and still lost to a team that has never been in a Super Bowl.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@BillKristol It just makes me sad to see what a clown show they have become.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@CodifyBaseball Charlie Furbush: tough luck for this guy. Tommy John in the minors and then a torn rotator cuff just a couple years in.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@CodifyBaseball

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAuthorGuy I don’t know… that was issued around 8am, a time when Miller would have to return to his crypt.

Also, there is nothing to fute. The Donald is now in the tractor beam of justice.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAuthorGuy When your relatives are this crazy, you just sit at the other end of the table at Thanksgiving and keep the wine flowing. There is just no escaping this guy.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAuthorGuy Noting Russia is conspicuously absent from that list… huh.

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@TheAuthorGuy Rico… Suave

https://t.co/59I1pm8skn

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@rooprajfox2 Sandhill crane https://t.co/qGkFO3zFWi

[Scott Parker @TheSoulOfWit]

@Twitter : This action is the equivalent of only allowing seatbelts in luxury vehicles. Your choice here is a cash grab over the integrity of your system.