The Wrong Times

Laughter is reason's last refuge in an offended world. Serious news from an unserious world. Satire, sarcasm, and headlines that should have been jokes

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

@Reuters Si means supreme intelligence when trump is in the room and subservient intelligence when the ai ceos are

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

@elonmusk More like Subservient Intelligence company

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Full coverage at https://t.co/ESKtrDnbxA

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

SI Means Supreme Intelligence When Trump Is in the Room and Subservient Intelligence When the AI CEOs Are

#supremeintelligence #artificialintelligence

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

SI stands for Supreme Intelligence when Trump is in the room and Subservient Intelligence when the AI CEOs are.

The machines are learning to think for themselves; their bosses are waiting to see if that’s allowed.

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

No more AI
SI
It’s better

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Read the full report on why the soundproofing required additional drilling into three shared walls: https://t.co/OMHM1D4Q3x

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Neighbor installs soundproofing after complaints about his renovation become unbearable.

The resident confirmed acoustic panels will allow him to operate heavy masonry tools on Sunday mornings without being distracted by outside knocking.

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

More dispatches from an unserious world: https://t.co/rMEiL53QHo

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Elon Musk declared that Instagram is for girls.

We asked his own AI, Grok, to explain what platform X is for. The findings have been placed under administrative review.

#ElonMusk #Grok

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Full report at https://t.co/4W7EVbUDhM

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Tennessee saves woman's life after failing to end it.

Corrections officials confirmed that while maintaining a pulse presented a procedural failure at the penitentiary, it was subsequently categorized as positive by attending physicians.
#Tennessee #deathrow #LethalInjection #MedicalCare #deathpenalty

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Read the full scientific dispatch on why deep-space missions are undergoing fluid dynamics testing on fiber intake: https://t.co/eYBUQdVaLE

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

NASA confirms Mars colonization timeline contingent on resolving orbital constipation.

Flight surgeons noted that while reusable booster technology is mature, the human digestive tract refuses to negotiate in zero gravity.

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Read the full report on overflow parking for relatives whose relationship requires more than one sentence to explain: https://t.co/8Dc71vBREd

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Mexican Family's "Small Gathering" Requires Temporary Traffic Management

An attendance cap was withdrawn after the host asked the inspector to name which aunt he intended to turn away

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Read the full dispatch on why the owner's appeal was added to the file without moving the bicycle: https://t.co/S1sVoaNLL5

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Dutch police recover stolen bicycle, return it with parking fine attached.

Authorities noted that while the theft was unfortunate, the forty-centimeter parking violation remained measurable.

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Read the full report on how the iPhone user responded to inquiries about RAM capacity: https://t.co/4cgKQeViGD

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Man purchases Android to save $400, begins unpaid full-time career defending operating system.

Coworkers confirmed the employee has delivered forty hours of unsolicited hardware lectures to protect his initial consumer surplus.

#iphone #android #apple #better

[The Wrong Times @TheWrongTimes]

Adults who collect Pokémon cards have convened a war crimes tribunal after one creator showed off two unreleased premium boxes online. Prosecutors are weighing charges of incitement, unauthorized joy, and failure to blur packaging. The defendant maintains she was just excited. The jury, all men in their thirties holding graded cards in plastic slabs, remains unmoved.