The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸

Baltimore bookseller. once wrote stuff: SFGate, The Ringer, GQ, Complex, Deadspin, Vice, the New Yorker

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Roast Beef. 2010-2023. My best friend in the entire world. You are my entire heart. We love you so much. After thirteen years I honestly don't know what I'm going to do without you. Thank you for making me a better person. Thank you for choosing me.

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Live your life Nellieball style

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

It was a school day so I went to school.

[Jessie @ojessie__]

Who remembers what they were doing the morning of 9/11?

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Pretty sure they live together?

[Complex Pop Culture @ComplexPop]

Elijah Wood, Sean Astin, Dominic Monaghan and Billy Boyd reunited in a new photo 📸

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Legend. Will never see his like again.

[Marc Stein @TheSteinLine]

Hall of Famer Don Nelson, three-time NBA Coach of the Year and five times a champion as a player with the Boston Celtics, has died at age 86.

The family has issued this statement:

“On Sunday morning our beloved husband, dad, grandfather and great-grandfather Don Nelson peacefully went to be with the Lord, surrounded by his loving family. Throughout his last week, friends and family encircled him with love, sharing the blessing of his friendship and revisiting treasured memories.”

[Zachary Lipez @ZacharyLipez]

“currently a scholar at the Declaration of Independence Center for the Study of American Freedom at the University of Mississippi”

My man teaches Libtard 101 at the These Colors Don’t Run School for Captain America Studies, and he’s out here insulting people with actual jobs

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

WNBA discourse.

[conor @conor_brn]

It must feel good as fuck to be an old man and dawdle around holding your hands behind your back

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Hm, seems like a real story

[LIZZY💥 @LizzyStarrrdust]

Okay so here's what I'm talking about. I recently went out with a male friend for the first time. This was not within any kind of "dating" context. Just friends.

He got a beer and had no bottle opener. He asked if I had a bottle opener. I had a lighter so I opened his beer with my lighter.

On the surface, whoever has the means to open the beer should open the beer. But as a woman, even outside the context of dating, I read that as a weakness in him. It turned me off to viewing him as any type of potential mate. Even when that wasn't a potential in the first place.

I was talking to him about this this morning, asking his permission to tell the story and he said "well now anytime we hang out I'm going to ask you to open my beer just to fuck with you."

And this immediately reversed my reaction because purposely fucking with me in this lighthearted way is a show of confidence and dominance.

Women are always reading your signals to assess your potential mate value. Even the women you're not dating. Even the women you're just passing on the street.

[Chuck Grassley @ChuckGrassley]

Windsor Heights Dairy Queen is good place for u kno what

[Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen]

me and the girls are always saying this

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

@catalie68 yes, very fun read, so excited for you!!!

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

My most normal sounding voice: "We are in a period of darkness most of us won't live to see the end of."

[kang @jaycaspiankang]

What why!?!

[COSMIC 🖖🏾 SLOP @afrocosmist]

talking to my sister about Star Trek. mentioned they have no money in the future, to which she replied "Like you?"

[Robin Lopez @rolopez42]

Biggest issue: If you're being drafted, people are saying "we want you around for 4 years" & I can't imagine anybody wants Enes Kanter or Royce White around them for even 4 minutes.

We've seen this illustrated whenever Enes is near Turkey or Royce comes close to logic/reality.

[Robin Lopez @rolopez42]

Yes we get it you love slapping people with women's names

[david @_elvishpresley_]

got kicked off Odysseus’s boat for saying “sooo THAT just happened” after every island

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Crazy that none of these people looks anything like my wife. We should have a talk about this.

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

My Dad was a fan. Also a fan of 1941. I mean, he liked Spielberg's good movies too, to be clear, but I always found that interesting about ol' Dad.

[Claire Penis @ZeroSuitCamus]

My favorite Spielberg film? Probably Always, the film no one has ever seen or heard of including me

[The Kronstadt Gardener 🇵🇸 @ThomasAwful]

Why Randall Tarly is an analogue for Qasem Soleimani

[Chapo Trap House @CHAPOTRAPHOUSE]

Felix is back, so naturally this episode is like 50% about ASOIAF. Out now on Patreon! Link below!