I think the perspective/framing is paramount here.
I can think about someone I've loved and lost...
And rather than feel grief? I feel happy to have known them, grateful for the time shared and the memories made together.
Not everyone will be in your life forever, and that's okay.
the fastest way to get over a crush or potential relationship if you’re an artist in your soul - is often to realize you were in love with the ideal rather than the reality
this is the torment of the romantic, we muse ourselves with ideas and get high off of the potentials and then we inhabit that high and try to manifest it into reality
cognitive dissonance happens when the ideal and the real are disconnected - for example if someone feeds you signals of everything they know you want to hear, but then their true way of being is actually completely different from what they initially presented themselves as
this is often the artist’s torture and leads to feelings of betrayal and romantic rage
the reason it happens more if you’re passioned or creative is because people love to use creatives as an energy source, a wishing well where they can see their ideals
the simplest way is to say - if the person drains you, uses you for inspiration to inflate themselves with or monetize, doesn’t pour back into your cup, tries to belittle you in order to control you, plays games of social undermining to try to make themselves seem like they have social leverage, etc
all of these things are illusions - hungry ghost type shit
as an artist or a creative / romantic type of person we hold an immense self-love - this attracts those with inner lack because they want to feed off of it basically
once you realize and internalize all of this then the rosy mirage loses its hold, the high fades away, and only the ugly reality remains where you watch a soulless ghoul siphoning your energy
once the reality is grounded then detachment becomes easy, as the love you held on to never came from them, it came from within yourself
When everyone you encounter always takes something from you, even the monks and supposedly high saints, then you have to realize, no one has anything to give you. Only to take. The world is a no win scenario.
@ChiefLord999 My life has gotten better since I started saturating the astral realm with pink salt and plasma lava. I am furious at the state of this multiverse
“In all things, have no preferences.”
- Musashi -
When you stop chasing what you prefer and fully inhabit what is, your mind becomes clear, your movements become precise, and life stops feeling like a constant struggle against reality.