Tim Hewitt

melbourne Comedian.
get around it.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Mulder is like getting neser fresh from the source. Sick of it.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

The reality of test cricket dying has finally sunk in over this south africa series. The fact saffa cameramen are hardly finding babes in between shirtless slabs of meat blokes is the wake up call i needed.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Theres a trailer where reacher is having a car chase over the story bridge in a land cruiser, with Owen Wilson in the back seat. Im sure its dogshit, and brother, I'll be watching it.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Kinda got the tone of one of those viral d grade footy fire up speeches. Nah serious boys fucking dig in aye,

[One Nation Australia @OneNationAus]

No wonder the robotic uniparty leaders don't want to debate Warren.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Was wondering if the Ukrainian bot farm strike would have impacted cricket aus comment sections about Pat Cummins. Alas Putin may not be behind them..

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Instagram seems to think i want to watch heaps of videos of concreters roid raging, smashing energy drinks and pouring slabs. They are correct.

[Jimmy O'Brien @Jomboy_]

Eric on Survivor did a good Tim Robinson impression but not on purpose

[save us, sean darcy @mimibirch]

banning afl players from doing drugs is like when vegans try to feed their cat a vegan diet

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Supersport camera man have gone woke "yaaa find us a beautiful bird in the crowd aye"

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

Sad theyre putting the loser cartoonist out of work with slop

[katy 🌸 @KatyKray73]

This One Nation ad is absolute gold!

It’s okay to come out as a One Nation voter.

Come on, Victoria. 🇦🇺🧡

[paulmc @paulmac_78]

Of course this cunt is a Roosters fan

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

So good to cut to the roosters fans at the paddo inn. A horde of finance guys and marketing managers waiting for the cubicle to be free. Honestly a neutral going for the chooks must have a black heart.

[San Marino Fútbol 🇸🇲 @SanMarinoTeam]

Comerte 13 goles es normal, a todos les puede pasar.

Pero que te hagan 14 goles eso es un papelón, no podés volver a jugar.

[GOŁƊ @vidxn_]

NAOMI KLIEIN to SAM ALTMAN:

"...you ingested the entire written output of human civilization without consent, without compensation and without credit to build a system whose primary commercial application is eliminating the jobs of the people whose work you consumed.

You are not 'liberating human creativity' -- you are strip-mining it and selling it back at a markup while calling the theft 'training data'."

[Patrick S. Tomlinson @stealthygeek]

The trailer Musk and Zuckerberg refuse to air.

You know what to do.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

This is just how excited americans get to not have american beef under RFK

[LasVegasFill @LasVegasFill]

Papi Steak at Fontainebleau $1000 Beef Case features a 55oz MS9 pure blood Australian Wagyu Tomahawk with the most insane presentation ever. What do you think?

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

My face when Svetlana isn't here yet and I gotta talk to these fkn kids

[Charles Haig @charles_haig01]

Why won’t anybody think of rich people who won’t be able to exploit young foreign women

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

PVL get Daniel johns together and do a silverchair reunion to open the GF and all your bullshit is forgiven. A Newcastle fiesta the only way.

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

My understanding of wharfie time is it's kinda like nos in the fast & furious universe

[Tim Hewitt @TimHewitt]

NRL media with Vlandys