Tyler Isanhart

I'm Tyler, and I'm delicious. I'm not promiscuous, I'm Tylicious

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@hbomax Please let Pedro Pascal play every character

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@POTUS Still can’t pay rent 🤷‍♂️

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@DetroitPistons that’s it, as a born piston fan I have been through A LOT of bs, and I’m not even upset with the slow rebuild. But if you ever try to trade Saddiq again, we done 4 good. That man deserves so much respect for the 2 years he’s been carrying this 🗑 team

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Get you a boss that keeps buying you tequila even when you beg him to stop because you keep throwing up and you don’t want him to know. I promise you it’ll be fun - drunk Tyler to future Tyler

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Theatre is dead

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

I don’t care who’s in the new Spider-Man, if they don’t have the big wheel imma be upset #SpiderMan

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Your camera is out of focus 😂

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

If someone has a hazmat suit and wanted to come and give me head rubs while you tell me everything is gonna be okay, I’d truly appreciate it

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Hey @KITKAT dm me, I gotta bunch of new KitKat flavor ideas we need to discuss 🤔🤔💰

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@BoboGamma And as I now write the paper, the power goes out.

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Here I am, growing as a student and not turning in my assignments at last second. So why do I still feel like I need to throw up?

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@BoboGamma No no, that one will be turned in at last second

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Just listened to the entire book of Dracula in 8 hours at 2x speed and I’ve unlocked a higher level of power and knowledge. I am God.

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@karinna_taylor “My dearest Alexandria, I just got off the seventh train and now I’ve been greeted with a horse and carriage”

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Yo, how many rides this mf gonna take to get to Dracula’s house??

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Today is a sad day. Don’t mind me while I watch Frasier and smoke all day

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

Bicycle Thieves? More like, “Dude Where’s my Bicicletta?” Am I right???

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

When I have a kid, like a young one, I’m gonna show them black and white movies and talk about how great the colors are just to scare them into thinking they’ve gone colorblind. That’ll teach that lil shit not to eat my Oreos anymore

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@mulaney and you thought you had it bad with #improv...

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

@positive_emo_ Don’t you do me like this

[Tyler Isanhart @TJmason27]

If you’re going to “prank call” me, don’t leave your number...